Reply to: Stool softner

[RichardCranium]

Ribbed condoms - give you traction in the mud....allegedly.

CUK is such an education.

I'm frightened to ask, but someone once said homosexualists use iron filings in such circumstances. I dare not even Google that.

[Drewster]

Ribbed condoms - give you traction in the mud....allegedly.

OFFS - That image is gross!!!!

Nice one OS!!

(No offence HAB)....

[oracleslave]

Surely that would pack things in even further?

Ribbed condoms - give you traction in the mud....allegedly.

[Drewster]

one litre prune juice is the answer

Presumably warmed up and inserted using a stirrup pump?

[Andy2]

one litre prune juice is the answer

[Drewster]

Surely that would pack things in even further?

Thats a pretty good point... but personally if I knew that HAB was coming along with such intentions it would make me Tulip myself......

[Shimano105]

Surely that would pack things in even further?

[DimPrawn]

Stool softner

HAB could probably sort you out.

[Cyberman]

Porridge and tea together works wonders every morning.

[Drewster]

Real ale.

Sorted.

The yeast must be live.

(Or a curry with a boiled egg in it).

Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!
I think I am going to <mmmmmmph!> Oh Gawd..... Back soon...........

[Cyberman]

I find that a cushion softens my stools.

[Toastiness]

Apparently scientists have come up with a cure for constipation.

They worked it out with pen and paper...



IGMC

[hyperD]

Hi Zeity - been lurking more than posting! And blogging.

[Shimano105]

Or fuit, veg and water i.e. a better diet? Nah, that's stupid.

[Churchill]

8 pints of Guiness and a trip to Bali - You'll never tulip solid again.

ten days in bali, got four days to go
ten days of terror cos im glued to the throne,And im tuliptin' in litres and firin' both ends,i'll never tulip solid again.


And its cost me a fortune for this holiday, stead of pissin' it up, christ, im tuliptin' it away.
cause im glued to the loo while my mates are out ragin', i'll never tulip solid again.

I'll never tulip solid again,
or hold anything down for aslong as i live, cause me arse is jammed open from freckle fatigue, i'll never tulip solid again.

I called mum back home, she sed mix up a cup. of cornflour and gravox to thicken it up, then she pissed her self laughin and hung up the phone, i'll never tulip solid again.


Just had a crap and im wipin me ring, havent quite finished, start spewin' again, Jesus, hope i remember to use the right hand, i'll never tulip solid again.

i'll never tulip solid again, so i'll rig up a faucet to stick up me ring, at least wen i fart i wont splatter me jeans, i'll never tulip solid again.

I'm doin' cartwheels as i try to guess, a crap or a chunder- christ whats comin' next, will it spray through me fingers or run down me leg, i'll never tulip solid agen.

slipped on some tulip a foot thick on the floor, skid arse over tit, then i spewed a bit more, Now i gotta sift through it cause me denture fell in, i'll never tulip solid agen.

I'll never tulip solid again, me rings hangin' out n me guts have caved in, i'll be buried in a bucket and me mates will all sing- "he'll never tulip solid again"