Reply to: Company Medical

[PerlOfWisdom]

Just had medical it was really good.

Eyesight - thorough exam - all okay
BP - all good
Height - far too tall
Weight - all good

Going to spend a fortune of new office furniture for me as I am tall.

All took an hour - and I am going to charge them £85 for the pleasure of my begrudging company.

And you'd have paid BUPA over £200 for that.

[BlackenedBiker]

Just had medical it was really good.

Eyesight - thorough exam - all okay
BP - all good
Height - far too tall
Weight - all good

Going to spend a fortune of new office furniture for me as I am tall.

All took an hour - and I am going to charge them £85 for the pleasure of my begrudging company.

[PerlOfWisdom]

You'd like to think so, wouldn't you? But it doesn't work like that.

I went out with a bint who worked in Personnel for a large corporation. There was a 'confidential medical' form as part of the application form for permies, these were filed with the HR records.

So she - and the other Personnel bints - could, and would, pull up the medical records of prospective boyfriends, people who had upset them and so on. She gave me the run down on everyone I worked with. This had included a mental health assessment of one of my own team members: it confirmed he was indeed classified as disabled but safe to work with provided he was only in a non-public-facing role.

Once your employer has your medical details, assume that loud-mouth dick-head at the desk opposite has them too.


Back in the days when I applied for permie roles, they would occasionally include a medical questionnaire asking for details of any hospital visits ever, any body deformities or any medication taken in the past 24 months. Between the Missus & I we would neither of us fill in such a form because there have been things we would not want a colleague to know. I had an operation as a teenager I don't want anyone to know about. My wife's best friend recently had a piles operation - would you want your colleagues to know about that? Would you want the Project Manager to find out you had a mental health issue even if it was dealt with ten years ago? Or a sex-change? Or cosmetic surgery? Or six toes on one foot?


For personal reasons, I would simply refuse the medical and say they can contact my GP if they want anything assessed.

This is why I don't trust the government with the ID cards system. I worked on the NHS system and could easily have got full access to the database for the whole of England. Most of the staff weren't even British citizens.

[Peoplesoft bloke]

The entire world is Orwellian mate. Do try and keep up. Look up at the CCTV camera above your head, no not that one, the one that looks like a smoke alarm, yes that's the one. Now

And it's all run by twonks who don't even know what it's for. Someone at clientco asked (on the intranet) why they had introduced a requirement for everyone to wear id badges visisble at all times - the twonk who replied said "because the external twonk from BSI said we should"

[Peoplesoft bloke]

The entire world is Orwellian mate. Do try and keep up. Look up at the CCTV camera above your head, no not that one, the one that looks like a smoke alarm, yes that's the one. Now

And it's all run by twonks who don't even know what it's for. Someone at clientco asked (on the intranet) why they had introduced a requirement for everyone to wear id badges visisble at all times - the twonk who replied said "because the external twonk from BSI said we should"

[suityou01]

Bloody hell. This is all rather Orwellian.

The entire world is Orwellian mate. Do try and keep up. Look up at the CCTV camera above your head, no not that one, the one that looks like a smoke alarm, yes that's the one. Now

[gingerjedi]

I assume they'll be offering you the free company flu jab come autumn time?

I'd go for it, could be a life saver this time around.

[BlackenedBiker]

Maybe they want you to have the medical because of that strange rash you have developed....

Did that take long, or was it straight off the cuff (so to speak). Well done anyway, keep that quality coming

[PM-Junkie]

I am contracting at a company that has a policy that EVERYONE goes through a medical. I am hoping that it is simply an occupational health thing.

However I hate the thought of it, as a contractor, and I don't wish to go.

What are my rights.......and your advice...

Maybe they want you to have the medical because of that strange rash you have developed....

[BlackenedBiker]

Got a weight problem have we?

Like you wouldn't believe

[RichardCranium]

I've got 12 inches but I don't use it as a rule.





IGMC

[Mich the Tester]

I am 6'5" but if everything was in proportion I would be 7'2"

Got a weight problem have we?

[BlackenedBiker]

So, you have a definate medical need for a psychological shake down, and while you're passing the office you should pick up a new ruler, that one appears to be broken....

Unless of course, you're making that typical schoolboy error and you're reading from the cm side again

If only that were true, Mrs Biker would be so grateful

I am 6'5" but if everything was in proportion I would be 7'2"

(literal picture)

[Drewster]

Apart from the 10 inch todger no, but that fact causes friction in itself

Could I just clarify...
a) You have a 10 inch todger and you don't want your collegues to know!

b) You rub it so much it has got blisters? I guess that explains A!

[thelace]

Apart from the 10 inch todger no, but that fact causes friction in itself

So, you have a definate medical need for a psychological shake down, and while you're passing the office you should pick up a new ruler, that one appears to be broken....

Unless of course, you're making that typical schoolboy error and you're reading from the cm side again