Bizzare shopping experience

[Clippy]

Ahem.

I was sat in my cold bedsit in Brum completely naked in front of my ZX Spectrum trying to surf the internet for some tasteful pictures of naked wimmin.

While I was waiting for my modem to download a nipple I thought I'd post a story using one of my fembots.

God, I hope I finally get laid this Xmas!

[Doggy Styles]

I was working at Tesco yesterday, underneath of one of the fridges fixing the pump, when this woman bends down and grabs my todger. By the time I'd slid out, she'd run off and all I saw was a husband and wife having an argument.

[Paula]

I was out shopping at Tesco yesterday, I bent down to handle a bannana when I noticed some geek stood behind me having a Pot Noodle. I went to call security but he ran off leaving only a slippery hazzard behind. I realised I had forgotten to wear my skirt again. Silly me