Christmas Do confessions and/or stories

[Bagpuss]

The last good one I went to we set the tables decorations on fire then had a food fight with the next table. Later that night my g/f gave me a BJ in the hotel lobby. Halcion days

[EternalOptimist]

The last party I went to saw the main consultant coming 'out of the closet' after a bottle of wine. All very well till he started to massage the shoulders of the young guy sitting next to me.

cringing all round

bah humbug

[Mich the Tester]

I went to a christmas do at the Manoir when working for Citibank. Only the contractors could afford to go so it was a good evening.

That's more like it mate!

[BrilloPad]

I went to a christmas do at the Manoir when working for Citibank. Only the contractors could afford to go so it was a good evening.

[MaryPoppins]

I haven’t attended an office Christmas party since 1998, when I struggled to avoid drifting into a vegetative state during a speech by the MD of my employer at the time. I just can’t stand office parties, office dinners, team get togethers or any of that permie tripe. I don’t want to ever have to go to one of these pathetic attempts at a party, and in fact office parties are one of my top reasons to avoid going permie.

Same here! The only one I went to was years ago, a cringeworthy 'Company Christmas Lunch' at a local hotel. Crunch point for me came when everyone was seated in the restaurant, and the 'compere' (i.e. permie twat with a microphone) declared that everyone should look under their chairs to find the piece of paper taped to the underside. On it was written one of my items from Twelve Days of Christmas, which each of us would have to stand up and SING, at the appropriate time in the song. I picked up my bag and walked out at that point, muttering "**** that" not quite under my breath.

[Mich the Tester]

Oh what a pity. With your positive attitude I bet you'd be such a riot and sorely missed.

I really don't care whether anyone misses me as long as they pay me.

[oracleslave]

I haven’t attended an office Christmas party since 1998, when I struggled to avoid drifting into a vegetative state during a speech by the MD of my employer at the time. I just can’t stand office parties, office dinners, team get togethers or any of that permie tripe. I don’t want to ever have to go to one of these pathetic attempts at a party, and in fact office parties are one of my top reasons to avoid going permie.

Oh what a pity. With your positive attitude I bet you'd be such a riot and sorely missed.

[Mich the Tester]

I haven’t attended an office Christmas party since 1998, when I struggled to avoid drifting into a vegetative state during a speech by the MD of my employer at the time. I just can’t stand office parties, office dinners, team get togethers or any of that permie tripe. I don’t want to ever have to go to one of these pathetic attempts at a party, and in fact office parties are one of my top reasons to avoid going permie.

[Flubster]

I make a point of shagging the company secretary after every Christmas do.

Same here, but can I have a go first this year please?

[gingerjedi]

I make a point of shagging the company secretary after every Christmas do.

[Money Money Money]

A few years ago I remember Key 103 (radio station in Manchester) had this feature where people would ring up in the morning and confess to things that had gone on the night before at their work Christmas do. This all went pear shaped when a woman rang in to confess that she'd spent most of the night sh@gging her married boss. It happened that the boss's wife was listening and managed to get enough pieces of the jigsaw to work out it was her husband and then it all got very messy. They pulled the feature after that.

So, in a similar spirit, who would like to offer any confessions or good stories from Christmas do's past or present?

I sh@gged your mrs.

HTH

[Alf W]

A few years ago I remember Key 103 (radio station in Manchester) had this feature where people would ring up in the morning and confess to things that had gone on the night before at their work Christmas do. This all went pear shaped when a woman rang in to confess that she'd spent most of the night sh@gging her married boss. It happened that the boss's wife was listening and managed to get enough pieces of the jigsaw to work out it was her husband and then it all got very messy. They pulled the feature after that.

So, in a similar spirit, who would like to offer any confessions or good stories from Christmas do's past or present?