Reply to: Muppets.........

[PAH]

It's good to know that you're so focussed on improving your athletic performance and cycling technique.

Yes, the truth about his love of cycling begins to emerge.

I suppose it's only natural though. Women think men are being chivalrous when we open the door for them and say "after you". Strange how the back of the knee is infinately more attractive than the front, too.

[chicane]

I've many wondrous sequences wherein I'm stuck behind a lady cyclist and the camera is just pointed right at her large bottom

It's good to know that you're so focussed on improving your athletic performance and cycling technique.

[threaded]

adjoining

There's nothing quite like owning adjoining fields to make one feel lovely, is there?

Talking of feeling lovely. I know Xoggoth will like it when I'm done. Threaded being threaded, I've many wondrous sequences wherein I'm stuck behind a lady cyclist and the camera is just pointed right at her large bottom, for mile upon mile, wondrous large bottoms pumping away on the saddle, the creak of leather, the rush of gears, the zing of tire on tarmac.

[bogeyman]

we own ajoining fields nearby :-)

adjoining

There's nothing quite like owning adjoining fields to make one feel lovely, is there?

[threaded]

As a sideline you may have something the insurers of said vehicles may be willing to pay to see. Firstly to substantiate any claims they're processing and secondly to decide how much to raise their premiums by.

Yes, many ideas, one like that: revenge being a dish best served cold, I've already had talks with the guy who sells the claims camera system the insurers use in Denmark, we own ajoining fields nearby :-) .

Another is a pub game where you have to guess what said loony will do at the next junction, will he go straight on, turn left, right, rear end someone, go cross country to avoid the queue, get out and kick someones car, attack the camera man: the thing being, each game stage will have all these potential outcomes so it'll be random what happens next, a bit like them horse racing CDs.

[Bagpuss]

Don't take offence, in so doing you are assuming that other peoples opinions are important and/or useful. They aren't. People are idiots. Go about your merry way doing what is reasonable in your opinion and everyone else can go fk themselves. Works for me.

Have you been reading Ghandi's biography again?

[PAH]

One of the problems I've so far discovered is that there is in fact only a small number of loony drivers, so I am capturing many sequences of the same vehicles at various junctions on different days, and that does look staged. Interesting to see these cars becoming more scratched and dented as time goes on though, kind of like time-lapse.

As a sideline you may have something the insurers of said vehicles may be willing to pay to see. Firstly to substantiate any claims they're processing and secondly to decide how much to raise their premiums by.

[shoes]

I'm quite happy for people to flash me if I have genuinely forgotten to turn off my fogs lights and they are not needed, I take offence when they are needed.

Don't take offence, in so doing you are assuming that other peoples opinions are important and/or useful. They aren't. People are idiots. Go about your merry way doing what is reasonable in your opinion and everyone else can go fk themselves. Works for me.

[threaded]

So more You've Been Framed then?

I think the biggest obstacle apart from the trucks will be convincing people this was real life footage and not staged like so many real life shows are.

One of the problems I've so far discovered is that there is in fact only a small number of loony drivers, so I am capturing many sequences of the same vehicles at various junctions on different days, and that does look staged. Interesting to see these cars becoming more scratched and dented as time goes on though, kind of like time-lapse.

[PAH]

Not quite, this is to be more comedic, you know something is going to happen at each junction, but you just don't know quite what to expect. Occasionally it is not at a junction: cyclist cycling along a quite stretch, apparently nothing to worry about, suddenly a car screaches to a halt in front mounts the cycle path, driver jumps out and attacks the cyclist. Or a farm escapee monster white turkey suddenly darts out of the bushes and tries to commit suicide by bicycle wheel. Or a wheel falls off a truck and all you see is the wheel overtaking the cyclist on the cycle path and disappearing into the distance. That kind of thing.

So more You've Been Framed then?

I think the biggest obstacle apart from the trucks will be convincing people this was real life footage and not staged like so many real life shows are.

[threaded]

Unfortunately, like artists, it will only really be worth a lot when he gets squashed live on camera.

Otherwise it's just a variation of the endless Police Camera Action type programmes.

Not quite, this is to be more comedic, you know something is going to happen at each junction, but you just don't know quite what to expect. Occasionally it is not at a junction: cyclist cycling along a quite stretch, apparently nothing to worry about, suddenly a car screaches to a halt in front mounts the cycle path, driver jumps out and attacks the cyclist. Or a farm escapee monster white turkey suddenly darts out of the bushes and tries to commit suicide by bicycle wheel. Or a wheel falls off a truck and all you see is the wheel overtaking the cyclist on the cycle path and disappearing into the distance. That kind of thing.

[oracleslave]

Otherwise it's just a variation of the endless Police Camera Action type programmes.

Doesn't mean there isn't money to be made.

[Churchill]

Right so I turn my lights off and then back on 30 seconds later when we hit another batch ?? Far safer to just leave them on while I'm driving down roads that I know are filled with fog patches that severely reduce visibility, that way people in the fog have a chance to see me even though I have just driven out of it.

It's not as if it wasn't foggy outside the big clumps of the stuff either.

You're in the wrong!

[PAH]

Unfortunately, like artists, it will only really be worth a lot when he gets squashed live on camera.

Otherwise it's just a variation of the endless Police Camera Action type programmes.

[oracleslave]

Yeps, essentially. They come to me, I get a crew or crews together and film the race, give the producer the raw footage with notes saying where the camera person thought interesting bits are. They then get an editor to work it for what they want, and I get paid proportional to number of frames shown, where in the program, how much of the screen real-estate it covered, time of day, lots of variables that work some fancy formula.

Sounds like a good sideline, particularly if you enter loads of races and they are covered regularly on telly.