Reply to: Grand Designs...

[Churchill]

Are there any planning laws against living in a castle in the air?

Gordon Brown built the economy on such principles!

[PAH]

I remember a bloke nearby who wanted to build a house and they refused planning permission so he built on stilts (only about 6 inches tall mind you) until the local council caved in

Not sure how stilts circumvent planning regs, but it's given me an idea:

If there's currently no need for planning permission to park a non permanent structure on your own land, why not levitate your newbuild on magnets using similar technology to those trains?

Are there any planning laws against living in a castle in the air?

[darmstadt]

There was another farmer who built a house, got refused planning & buried it.

When they found out they made him dig it up & demolish it.

I remember a bloke nearby who wanted to build a house and they refused planning permission so he built on stilts (only about 6 inches tall mind you) until the local council caved in

[TheFaQQer]

Cross his palm with silver... it works wonders around here...

Build the thing anyway, then say "whoops!" and offer cash works round my parents way.

Or just appeal it - the council has to pay the costs of appeals whether they win or lose, which is the blackmail (sorry, argument) being put forward by my old school who were in danger of having their application turned down. "We don't want to appeal, as it will cost the council a lot of money, but..." works a treat.

[PAH]

How do you subtly hint at the possibility of a bribe if you aren't sure how they're going to respond?

[threaded]

We had 8 pig sheds on our farm which had planning permission to be converted into a house. When my folks submitted plans they were rejected because the house had to be similar in size to the existing building. That meant that it had to be about 10 feet tall at the front and 4 feet tall at the back. The house they were proposing was much nicer than the shabby looking sheds and in keeping with the houses in the area but the local planning bod was just throwing his weight about.

Nah, just wanted a consultancy fee to help your parents write the application correctly.

[BoredBloke]

Did you hear about that farmer who spent several years secretly building a castle under a giant haystack?

Much as I disapprove of people building on the countryside without planning permission (or with it come to that), I thought it was so funny he should really be allowed to keep it.

We had 8 pig sheds on our farm which had planning permission to be converted into a house. When my folks submitted plans they were rejected because the house had to be similar in size to the existing building. That meant that it had to be about 10 feet tall at the front and 4 feet tall at the back. The house they were proposing was much nicer than the shabby looking sheds and in keeping with the houses in the area but the local planning bod was just throwing his weight about.

[threaded]

You may have a point... I used to be a star myself...

I was on the weekend sports roundup showing how to ride a MTB. I was really embarrased until I saw it, then thought that technique is really rather good. I ought to make my own movies...

[rootsnall]

I liked the idea of the house, but it needed to be on a much, much grander scale rather than being quite small and having stupidly out-of-scale features like the fireplace and huge TV....

It was 280 m2 ! Not a palace but pretty big in my book. I didn't like the idea fullstop.

They were the most clueless yet to make it onto Grand Designs, ideal Sarah Beeney fodder but they must be running out of clued up types for Grand Designs. They are nicely saddled with a monster mortgage for many a year and a ropey house.

[tim123]

What is it about IT people & property development?

I don't think there's a connection there at all.

The connection is between IT people and "peeps who wanna be on the telly".

tim

[MickeyP]

The Grand designs formula:

Presenter: hmmn, I'm not sure they are going to do it....

cut to last 2 minutes of the show [insert whatever you like]

Presenter: This is great, I love how they... [gushing & more gushing]


NEVER has he said 'this is a pigs ear, what a pair of dickheads!'

What are you talking about?? The bloke is always criticising the houses. It's one of the reasons why I watch it.

[TheFaQQer]

Ok.

Which one of you lunes was it that built himself a pastiche of the Adams Family House?

Without an architect or project manager or sufficient money?

I liked the idea of the house, but it needed to be on a much, much grander scale rather than being quite small and having stupidly out-of-scale features like the fireplace and huge TV.

And making an assumption that the plans (marked "Not to Scale") would be close enough to make accurate measurements for ordering the doors and windows...

[TheFaQQer]

The Grand designs formula:

Presenter: hmmn, I'm not sure they are going to do it....

cut to last 2 minutes of the show [insert whatever you like]

Presenter: This is great, I love how they... [gushing & more gushing]


NEVER has he said 'this is a pigs ear, what a pair of dickheads!'

He didn't quite phrases it like that, but he did criticise one development where the guy hadn't finished in a year. And when they did a Revisited programme a year later, he still hadn't finished it. Guy was minted but had no idea about it - building some kind of fancy glass house.

[Fishface]

The Grand designs formula:

Presenter: hmmn, I'm not sure they are going to do it....

cut to last 2 minutes of the show [insert whatever you like]

Presenter: This is great, I love how they... [gushing & more gushing]


NEVER has he said 'this is a pigs ear, what a pair of dickheads!'

[OwlHoot]

Did you hear about that farmer who spent several years secretly building a castle under a giant haystack?

Much as I disapprove of people building on the countryside without planning permission (or with it come to that), I thought it was so funny he should really be allowed to keep it.