Reply to: Just thought...leap year next year.....

[cailin maith]

Hilarious

[Sockpuppet]

Well done sir.

[Xenophon]

To help better manage the volume of marriage proposals next year I have set up a website:

www.marryxeno.com

All would-be Mrs Xenophons are advised that they should initiate their marriage proposals online where possible.

I am also in the process of setting up a phone number to deal with phone proposals. Proposals will be accepted up to midnight on February 29th 2008. Please do not propose after this time as your proposal will not count, but you may still be charged.

Xenophon Worldwide Amalgamated Enterprises Ltd reserves the right to cancel or suspend proposals at any time.

Each phone proposal costs 25p from a BT landline. Calls from mobiles and other networks may be higher. The total cost from which 12.5p will go to Xenophon Worldwide Amalgamated Enterprises Ltd will be dependent on the voter’s network.

Entrants must obtain permission from the bill payer before proposing.

Xenophon Worldwide Amalgamated Enterprises Ltd reserves the right to disqualify proposals if it has reasonable grounds to suspect that fraudulent proposals have occurred or if it considers there has been any attempt to rig the proposals.

Xenophon Worldwide Amalgamated Enterprises Ltd, its sub-contractors, subsidiaries and/or agencies cannot accept any responsibility whatsoever for any technical failure or malfunction or any other problem with any telephone network or line, system, server, provider or otherwise which may result in any proposal being lost or not properly registered or recorded.

Please note that you cannot propose via text.

[Sockpuppet]

The sole purpose of a groom at a wedding is to make the photographs look balanced.

By far the best quote I have heard this year. I'm going to save that one for later.

[Sockpuppet]

Sadly, young man, it has nothing whatsoever to do with you when, how or where you will get married. When a woman chooses you, you will do as you are told.

I like to think my lack of manners or charm will form a protective forcefield round said bride (mother in law powered) that will protect me.

[BrowneIssue]

I am never going to get married

Ah, the sweet lament of the innocent bachelor. How charming.

How naive!

Sadly, young man, it has nothing whatsoever to do with you when, how or where you will get married. When a woman chooses you, you will do as you are told.

Just like all the rest of us married men did.

[BrowneIssue]

Unfortunately, at your wedding, you will be a minor detail.

Sounds a bit mental to me.

The sole purpose of a groom at a wedding is to make the photographs look balanced.

[cailin maith]

I have some "interesting" ways of finding out if a potential wife is the right person. Although I am never going to get married as I have an irrational fear of wedding receptions.


Number 1: tell her I am a trucker when we first meet - if she clears off not for me.

Number 2: Another idea I have is that I shall have nae sex from the day I propose to the day we get married. 2 reasons. First if she can survive a year without sex and not go else where then might be one to hold onto. (or she might be really good at hiding herself going elsewhere in which case thats also good as I'll never find out). Second, after a year of no sex should make for an interesting wedding night.

Number 3: (sure I told you about this before) more of a proposal thing. Arrange a couple of trips to a"romantic" place. Let is "sliip" to her best friends boyfriend/husband/cat that you are going to propose. They will tell her best friend who will in turn tell her.

Then. Throw a curve ball and don't propose. SHe'll get back from the holiday feeling a little miffed...give her some cold shouldering to make it even better.

The next day tell her I've broken down in the lorry at South Mimms Services and ask to come and pick me up. Choose a night that is tulipting down with rain and her favourite program is on the telly.

If she comes propose - again probably one to hang on to.

I am so good at this stuff I should make a TV show on it...will be amazing.

Form a line ladies, form a line.


Maybe we should have a Ask Sockpuppet thread limited to relationships and tulip.

"Sockpuppets guide to marriage and stuff."

Rubbish you don't fool me - you will find the right woman and fall head over heels and be happy ever after!!!

For the record..... I didn't get married just for the "expensive memories" I really did naievely (sp??) think it was forever....

[Sockpuppet]

It's one way of finding out if she really wants "you" or the expensive wedding memories!

I have some "interesting" ways of finding out if a potential wife is the right person. Although I am never going to get married as I have an irrational fear of wedding receptions.


Number 1: tell her I am a trucker when we first meet - if she clears off not for me.

Number 2: Another idea I have is that I shall have nae sex from the day I propose to the day we get married. 2 reasons. First if she can survive a year without sex and not go else where then might be one to hold onto. (or she might be really good at hiding herself going elsewhere in which case thats also good as I'll never find out). Second, after a year of no sex should make for an interesting wedding night.

Number 3: (sure I told you about this before) more of a proposal thing. Arrange a couple of trips to a"romantic" place. Let is "sliip" to her best friends boyfriend/husband/cat that you are going to propose. They will tell her best friend who will in turn tell her.

Then. Throw a curve ball and don't propose. SHe'll get back from the holiday feeling a little miffed...give her some cold shouldering to make it even better.

The next day tell her I've broken down in the lorry at South Mimms Services and ask to come and pick me up. Choose a night that is tulipting down with rain and her favourite program is on the telly.

If she comes propose - again probably one to hang on to.

I am so good at this stuff I should make a TV show on it...will be amazing.

Form a line ladies, form a line.


Maybe we should have a Ask Sockpuppet thread limited to relationships and tulip.

"Sockpuppets guide to marriage and stuff."

[Cooperinliverp00l]

That means that Cooper Junior could arrive into this world a whole day earlier......better get on with this nursery

[cailin maith]

Not as bad as the day you decied to venture into the TPD thread.

Morning sweetheart.... love you!!

[tay]

It wasn't one of my better ideas...

Not as bad as the day you decied to venture into the TPD thread.

[miffy]

The poor unfortunate chick that I end up with isn't going to know what hit her when we pull up outside the "Chapel of love" in a rented Crysler.

That would be awesome... hilarious!

What about the honeymoon though? A grotty motel somewhere for a few nights?

It's one way of finding out if she really wants "you" or the expensive wedding memories!

Don't forget to keep your receipts too!

[Sysman]

I got proposed to one Leap Year's Day. She was waiting outside the house when I got home from work.

I suddenly found that I couldn't speak any German

Don't knock it. It was a narrow escape!

[Gonzo]

Sounds a bit mental to me. Does that make it ok for me to totally separate reality from fantasy and think that my wife to be is Jessica Alba when we are on the wedding night mattress dancing session?

Yes, but she will be pretending that you are Orlando Bloom.




hth