health & safety at client site

[Board Game Geek]

You know, I think there could be a lot of fun to have with the "rules-obsessed" HR Department. They love anything official which gives them power.

So, how about the following.

Get the H&S logos, etc and make a mock up "Communiqué" from the Dept of H&S.

Something like : "As part of the Goverment's 5-a-day initiative, and in conjunction with the Dept of Health, there is new initiative to ensure that H&S representatives make all employees aware that they are strongly encouraged to eat at least 5 portions of fruit and vegetables a day. Legislation currently under way will stipulate that it is the responsibility of the H&S officers of the company to ensure that suitable notices are placed around the premises reminding employees of this forthcoming legislation. Please find attached a sample poster for the campaign which can be displayed in advance of the new regulations."

Sample Poster Blurb.

"Are you eating at least 5-a-Day ???"
"Forthcoming legislation assumes responsibility on the H&S Officers within a company to ensure that all staff consume at least 5 portions of fruit or vegetables a day. Checklists will be issued to employees nearer to the time, and random stool samples will be collected to ensure all employees adhere to H&S guildlines. If you have any questions, seek any guidance, or just want to drop off a stool sample, please contact HR and we will be more than willing to help"

Pop these around the office, light the touch paper, and retire to watch the fireworks fly.

If you can get your hands on some small plastic containers, attach a sticky label that says "Name : Position : " on them and leave them in a cardboard box under the poster.

[Board Game Geek]

I have to do one of these every year.

It's an online series of 4 modules, covering Fire Training, H&S at work, Ergonomics, etc.

We were all told to pop in to the training classroom and do it on a specific day.

Then I noticed that the email link they sent us was for an internet site.

So I logged in one sunday afternoon, and had a few beers whilst I clicked the multiple choice questions....

eg....

1. Up discovering a fire, what should you do ?

a) Ring the nearest fire alarm
b) Run away outside and wait in the car park
c) Nothing. It's someone else's problem.
d) Add some petrol to it
e) Try and put it out with a photocopier
f) All of the above

Submitted the results.

Monday morning, got an email from HR.

"We noticed that you have completed your H&S module, with a score of 100%. Well done !"

They didn't even check that I attended the classroom. It was the fact that the course had been completed which was all they cared about.

At least that allowed me Monday to get on with my real work.

[TheFaQQer]

19 of 19 was added yesterday.
It says "Shooting someone in the head will be regarded with the utmost seriousness and may lead to stern words from your line manager"

Only if you shoot them in the head five times or more.

Less than that and it's OK, it seems

[sasguru]

got to 5 of 19.. bored so have given up, back to reading CUK

19 of 19 was added yesterday.
It says "Shooting someone in the head will be regarded with the utmost seriousness and may lead to stern words from your line manager"

[chef]

got to 5 of 19.. bored so have given up, back to reading CUK

[chef]

" 4 of 19 Your monitor

Your monitor (display screen) should be fully adjustable in position,
swivel and tilt. "

i have no monitor.. just a laptop. 4 of 19!!!!!!.. am losing the will to live already

[sasguru]

They probably just want to remind you that shooting someone 7 times in the head is against H&S regs.

[Zorba]

I seem to recall that it's ok to do this, can't remember the exact reason why though. If you ask in one of the grown-up sections of the forum, you might get an answer from someone clever like Malvolio.

HTH

[chef]

This module will help you to:

Adjust your chair correctly.



great, always wanted to know how to do that..

[chef]

have just been sent a link by client H&S dept reminding me that i havent yet completed there H&S online training..

"Our company has invested in this program to ensure your safety and also to comply with the law. Unfortunately our records show that you have not yet completed all the modules, and it is essential that you now complete them."

do i? surely MyCo is responsible for onsite H&S? or possibly the agent if im Opted In/OUt (cant remember which as it's friday and im going home soon)..

anyhoot, what a great friday afternoon "work" schedule, 2hrs 10 mins to go..

Health & Safety is critical for my friday wellbeing