Reply to: Someone at last speaking out on the appalling Harry Potter books

[Burdock]

Purely in the interests of science, I have replaced the word "wand" with "wang" in the first Harry Potter Book

[Charles Foster Kane]

Purely in the interests of science, I have replaced the word "wand" with "wang" in the first Harry Potter Book

Let's see the results...

"Why aren't you supposed to do magic?" asked Harry.
"Oh, well -- I was at Hogwarts meself but I -- er -- got expelled, ter tell yeh the truth. In me third year. They snapped me wang in half an' everything

A magic wang... this was what Harry had been really looking forward to.

"Yes, yes. I thought I'd be seeing you soon. Harry Potter." It wasn't a question. "You have your mother's eyes. It seems only yesterday she was in here herself, buying her first wang. Ten and a quarter inches long, swishy, made of willow. Nice wang for charm work."
"Your father, on the other hand, favored a mahogany wang. Eleven inches. "

Harry took the wang. He felt a sudden warmth in his fingers. He raised the wang above his head, brought it swishing down through the dusty air and a stream of red and gold sparks shot from the end like a firework, throwing dancing spots of light on to the walls

"Oh, move over," Hermione snarled. She grabbed Harry's wang, tapped the lock, and whispered, 'Alohomora!"

The troll couldn't feel Harry hanging there, but even a troll will notice if you stick a long bit of wood up its nose, and Harry's wang had still been in his hand when he'd jumped - it had gone straight up one of the troll's nostrils.

He bent down and pulled his wang out of the troll's nose. It was covered in what looked like lumpy gray glue.

He ran onto the field as you fell, waved his wang, and you sort of slowed down before you hit the ground. Then he whirled his wang at the dementors. Shot silver stuff at them.

"Yes," Harry said, gripping his wang very tightly, and moving into the middle of the deserted classroom. He tried to keep his mind on flying, but something else kept intruding.... Any second now, he might hear his mother again... but he shouldn't think that, or he would hear her again, and he didn't want to... or did he?

Something silver-white, something enormous, erupted from the end of his wang

Then, with a sigh, he raised his wang and prodded the silvery substance with its tip.

'Get - off - me!' Harry gasped. For a few seconds they struggled, Harry pulling at his uncles sausage-like fingers with his left hand, his right maintaining a firm grip on his raised wang.

[andy]

I would still give her one though!!!!!

yeah , me too , but for a small charge

[wendigo100]

I would still give her one though!!!!!

Yeah, me too.

[Let-Me-In]

golddigger

No, she wouldn't have to pay me...well maybe a little!!!

[Burdock]

I would still give her one though!!!!!

golddigger

[wendigo100]

We can all criticise her but she has made a lot of money and a lot of fans from her books..well done to her I say...

Yeah, me too.

[Let-Me-In]

She should spend some of it on rectifying her concorde-like nose.

(miaow)

And attending creative writing nightschool classes.

(double miaow).

I would still give her one though!!!!!

[Burdock]

We can all criticise her but she has made a lot of money and a lot of fans from her books..well done to her I say...

She should spend some of it on rectifying her concorde-like nose.

(miaow)

And attending creative writing nightschool classes.

(double miaow).

[BoredBloke]

I agree. The fact that she has got kids reading should be a good thing. So some adults choose to read the books - that says more about those adults than the author.

[Let-Me-In]

We can all criticise her but she has made a lot of money and a lot of fans from her books..well done to her I say...

[BrilloPad]

You can appeal to the masses and have little critical worth. See Posh Spice.

Infact these days, talent seems to be inversely related to success.

So why aren't I successful?

[cailin dana]

I know I am going to get a pasteing for this - but I like the books and I saw the film last night and I liked that too!!

[fzbucks]

Without wishing to cause offence to any blind readers, all HP fans are blindly following where JKR wants to take them. Harry Potter has become like Star Wars or Lord of the Rings or whatever with a dedicated group of fanatic followers and a bemused rest of the world. Mind you, that JKR has really milked the (thin) plot to extract as much money as she could. I appreciate she had a hard life eralier on, but why the **** should we suffer for it? Lastly, I look at the authors, not just the books if I want to pass judgement. Verne and Herge were geniuses during their time, but to non-French speakers they mean nothing. One of my favourite authors is Frederic Forsyth, now his knowledge is f'n awesome - whenever he is on a panel, it is a joy to listen to him and not because I just happen to agree with his views.
Whenever I listen to her, she is so boring (like her books, you may say!)

How are you suffering from it?
I don't like the books - never read them but I don't think I am suffering from her success.
All I know is that my son reads more than I do when I was his age and not just harry potter books.

[TinTin]

HP and the 'blind' followers

Without wishing to cause offence to any blind readers, all HP fans are blindly following where JKR wants to take them. Harry Potter has become like Star Wars or Lord of the Rings or whatever with a dedicated group of fanatic followers and a bemused rest of the world. Mind you, that JKR has really milked the (thin) plot to extract as much money as she could. I appreciate she had a hard life eralier on, but why the **** should we suffer for it? Lastly, I look at the authors, not just the books if I want to pass judgement. Verne and Herge were geniuses during their time, but to non-French speakers they mean nothing. One of my favourite authors is Frederic Forsyth, now his knowledge is f'n awesome - whenever he is on a panel, it is a joy to listen to him and not because I just happen to agree with his views.
Whenever I listen to her, she is so boring (like her books, you may say!)