Originally posted by Xenophon
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Reply to: Girl killed by pit bull terrier
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Previously on "Girl killed by pit bull terrier"
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Originally posted by XenophonI freely admit that at times I can be a white collar red-neck. One of those times is when I read your story about hitting a dog as hard as you could with a large stick.
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Originally posted by wendigo100Clever reply.
I rest my case.
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Originally posted by XenophonI'd like to introduce you to my dog. Then watch you squeal in agony.
Xeno in 'I've had about enough of this now' mode
I rest my case.
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Such a shame the dog didn't eat the whole family.
Less chavs the better.
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Originally posted by Board Game GeekWhy do these bleeding chavs buy such vicious and unpredictable dogs ? What's the matter with them ?
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Uses for a dead cat
1: Door stopper
2: Skinned & cleaned a Davy Crocket style hat can be fashioned
3: Football for impromptu kick-about (N.B doesn't have to be dead)
4: Strung up by the gate post provides a useful reminder for other cat-vermin owners not to let their pests roam & sh1t in other peoples gardens
5: With a length of broom inserted - makes a useful toilet brush
Uses for a live cat
1: Testing the concentration of your car's anti-freeze
2: Moving target practice
3: Cardio Vascular exercise when hurling house bricks if you can't get to the shotgun in time
4: Testing the 4 wheel drive capabilities on your vehicle as you chase the vermin down
HTHLast edited by Troll; 3 January 2007, 12:13.
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Originally posted by freakydancerYou're right - they tulip all over my garden instead, and then dig up all my woodchip to try and cover it up.
******* things.
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Originally posted by wendigo100One example.
On a regular running route of mine in the eighties, there was a horse stable where all the riders seemed to bring their dogs. The dogs used to wait by the entrance gate, and when you went past, they'd surround you barking, jumping up, and nipping your hands and legs.
After suffering this twice, the third time I carried a large thick stick and, as I passed the stable and the dogs moved in, I whacked the biggest one I could see over the head as hard as I could. Lovely! They all ran off, and from then on whenever I ran round there, they were all standing quietly and peacefully watching as I went past.
Xeno in 'I've had about enough of this now' mode
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On a regular running route of mine in the eighties, there was a horse stable where all the riders seemed to bring their dogs. The dogs used to wait by the entrance gate, and when you went past, they'd surround you barking, jumping up, and nipping your hands and legs.
After suffering this twice, the third time I carried a large thick stick and, as I passed the stable and the dogs moved in, I whacked the biggest one I could see over the head as hard as I could. Lovely!
They all ran off, and from then on whenever I ran round there, they were all standing quietly and peacefully watching as I went past.
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Originally posted by BagpussDogs stink, at least cats are clean, and don't sh1t all over the footpath
******* things.
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Originally posted by TrollBecause they keep the local cat vermin problem down
DOgs stink, at least cats are clean, and don't sh1t all over the footpath
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Why would anyone want a dog?
A/ They smell of sh1t
B/ They make your house smell sh1t
C/ They sniff and lick sh1t and then lick your face
D/ They eat everything, including furniture
E/ They are really really stupid
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Originally posted by wendigo100But I hate dogs!
On my grand-dad's small-holding (circa 1965) , we had several dogs of various sizes, a large population of laying hens, a thriving colony of cats to keep the vermin down, and assorted goats, pigs and other critters.
The essential and well-understood hierarchy amongst these animals was: -
1) Humans (big or small ones)
2) A mature and formidable ginger tom cat ("Rufus")
3) "Rooster Number 1" (a one-legged, agressive, mental cock bird)
4) Yappy, hyperactive Jack Russell bitch ("Trixy")
5) Vicious and smelly billy goat ("Jasper")
6) Large, elderly black and white spotted male dog of uncertain parentage ("Patch")
7) Wives and offspring of #2 above
8) Pigs and other ungulates (intelligent, yet utterly unambitious)
9) Sundry nanny goats and their kids
10) Horses (not much brains)
11) Sheep (no brains at all)
The Dogs on the plot grew up to recognise the authority of humans, cats, goats and any other creature that had the strength of will to put them in their place. They yapped and snarled and bayed at anything that didn't stand up to them.
Dogs want leadership. They don't want to be boss - they want you (or anyone other than them) to be the boss.
When dogs find that they are the boss, they lose it completely!Last edited by bogeyman; 2 January 2007, 19:27.
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