Reply to: Golf

[Featureme]

New Zealand in Woodham - we can do a swap?

Deal


A couple met at Hilton Head and fell in love. They were discussing how they would continue the relationship after their vacations were over.

"It's only fair to warn you Jody." he said. "I'm a golf nut. I live, eat, sleep and breathe golf."

"Well, since you're being honest, so will I." Jody said. "I'm a hooker."

"I see." he said. Then brightening, he smiled. "It's probably because you're not keeping your wrists straight when you hit the ball."

[Scruff]

I'm a member at The Shire London in Barnet - it's the only course designed by Seve in the UK

Happy to sign anyone in if they fancy a game?

New Zealand in Woodham - we can do a swap?

[BrilloPad]

I'm a member at The Shire London in Barnet - it's the only course designed by Seve in the UK

Happy to sign anyone in if they fancy a game?

I was on that course last week. At hole five a lay appeared and invited me for sex round the back of the bushes. I obliged, but when I walked off she said "Seve would have done it again".

So I did. But when I walked off she said "Seve would have done it again".

That happened twice more before I just carried on walking.

She shouted "where are you going?". To which I said "I am off to call Seve to ask the par for this hole".

Taxi for Brillo....

[MrMarkyMark]

The idea was to discourage people! What have I done? Mods - please delete this thread.....

You have helped to create CUKs very own golf club.

[BrilloPad]

I'm a member at The Shire London in Barnet - it's the only course designed by Seve in the UK

Happy to sign anyone in if they fancy a game?

The idea was to discourage people! What have I done? Mods - please delete this thread.....

[Featureme]

I'm a member at The Shire London in Barnet - it's the only course designed by Seve in the UK

Happy to sign anyone in if they fancy a game?

[MrMarkyMark]

Get with the times, man..

When I'm playing a match I wear a stylish pair of red crushed velvet plus fours with a Paul Smith jumper & all topped off with either a Ping sun visor or a Calloway Golf Tam O Shanter depending on the weather.

Pics?

[Martin Scroatman]

A while ago I booked a hotel for the night for the family. Turns out it was a golf hotel Which meant the bar and restaurant were immediately out of bounds due to the golf bores in their horrid jumpers. The only thing worse is a party of rugby players.

I sent the kids out to play in what I thought was an enclosed area. Turns out there was a way onto the golf course. The kids went and played with the golf balls that were on the green. Really upset the pathetic gits. Oh how I laughed when they moaned.

I thought CUK posters would have known better. Except for DA who is not a contractor.

At least now I have flushed out the morons so I know who to target in future.

Cheers.

Get with the times, man..

When I'm playing a match I wear a stylish pair of red crushed velvet plus fours with a Paul Smith jumper & all topped off with either a Ping sun visor or a Calloway Golf Tam O Shanter depending on the weather.

[DodgyAgent]

A while ago I booked a hotel for the night for the family. Turns out it was a golf hotel Which meant the bar and restaurant were immediately out of bounds due to the golf bores in their horrid jumpers. The only thing worse is a party of rugby players.

I sent the kids out to play in what I thought was an enclosed area. Turns out there was a way onto the golf course. The kids went and played with the golf balls that were on the green. Really upset the pathetic gits. Oh how I laughed when they moaned.

I thought CUK posters would have known better. Except for DA who is not a contractor.

At least now I have flushed out the morons so I know who to target in future.

Cheers.

I am not a golfer

[BrilloPad]

Oh, like you don't moan when somebody's unruly kids get in the way of your lane swimming

It happens. Not much. But I just ignore them.

Interesting that you talk about unruly kids though. Kids are unruly.

Soon as I found out there was a golf course around I did stop the kids going there. I don't approve of them mixing with those types.....

[Martin Scroatman]

A while ago I booked a hotel for the night for the family. Turns out it was a golf hotel Which meant the bar and restaurant were immediately out of bounds due to the golf bores in their horrid jumpers. The only thing worse is a party of rugby players.

I sent the kids out to play in what I thought was an enclosed area. Turns out there was a way onto the golf course. The kids went and played with the golf balls that were on the green. Really upset the pathetic gits. Oh how I laughed when they moaned.I thought CUK posters would have known better. Except for DA who is not a contractor.

At least now I have flushed out the morons so I know who to target in future.

Cheers.

Oh, like you don't moan when somebody's unruly kids get in the way of your lane swimming

[I just need to test it]

I can see why people would like golf – balmy afternoons in beautiful surroundings, catching up with mates, a bit of gentle exercise followed by a swifty in the bar.

Though in my experience the weather is often pants, I’m so rubbish at golf that it is far removed from gentle exercise. By the 14th hole I am knackered, bored and wishing I was home.

There’s something about golfers that makes me feel aggressive towards them too. Not sure if it’s their clothes, their attitude, my insecurity that they can catch me out with their encyclopaedic knowledge of golf rules, jealousy that they are so much better at golf than me or jealousy that they don’t feel the guilt I do at clearing off from the family for half a day. But I cling to the belief that they go golfing because they can’t bear to be with their disgusting wives.

Golf – I get it but it’s not for me.

[BrilloPad]

A while ago I booked a hotel for the night for the family. Turns out it was a golf hotel Which meant the bar and restaurant were immediately out of bounds due to the golf bores in their horrid jumpers. The only thing worse is a party of rugby players.

I sent the kids out to play in what I thought was an enclosed area. Turns out there was a way onto the golf course. The kids went and played with the golf balls that were on the green. Really upset the pathetic gits. Oh how I laughed when they moaned.

I thought CUK posters would have known better. Except for DA who is not a contractor.

At least now I have flushed out the morons so I know who to target in future.

Cheers.

[Scruff]

Guilty - Club captain for my sins, this year - ends in 2 weeks, yippee!

[DodgyAgent]

Does anyone here play?

Yes. We do