Reply to: How to avoid ruin due to broken marriage?

[DonkeyRhubarb]

WHS

Unfortunately.

The "right girl" when you are 25 may not be the right when you are 45. Who can tell?

Surely the right girl when you are 45 is a girl who is 25?

[Platypus]

but I did all that!

shame she became physically ill followed by mentally ill. I accept people change as time goes by - but to go off the rails? Its just not cricket.

WHS

Unfortunately.

The "right girl" when you are 25 may not be the right when you are 45. Who can tell?

[BrilloPad]

marriage is supposed to be for life, thats why theres no real safe guards in place in the event of failure.
The only real way to protect yourself is to make sure its the right girl, work at the marriage and keep in mind that no ones perfect.

but I did all that!

shame she became physically ill followed by mentally ill. I accept people change as time goes by - but to go off the rails? Its just not cricket.

[Churchill]

marriage is supposed to be for life, thats why theres no real safe guards in place in the event of failure.
The only real way to protect yourself is to make sure its the right girl, work at the marriage and keep in mind that no ones perfect.

So guys, if you want this -> Don't forget plenty of this ->

[synoniv]

So how does a young bachelor boy in contracting protect himself from this potential situation? Is there a nifty IOU situation with parents that can be invoked should she walk out and demand all she can get. Or where can one put money aside for the future safe from a dodgy ex-wife getting her grubby hands on it- are personal pensions safe? should money go into some kind of family trust?

oh boy ! As a 'safe' solution, I'm sure you haven't thought of marrying an 'assetfull' & rich girl and then find way of transfering her assets to anonymised entities(here i mean wealth ok!) before break up If you are good in 'something' marriages still work

[Lewis]

marriage is supposed to be for life, thats why theres no real safe guards in place in the event of failure.
The only real way to protect yourself is to make sure its the right girl, work at the marriage and keep in mind that no ones perfect.

[Spacecadet]

marriage is supposed to be for life, thats why theres no real safe guards in place in the event of failure.
The only real way to protect yourself is to make sure its the right girl, work at the marriage and keep in mind that no ones perfect.

[DonkeyRhubarb]

oppps - you did say 18 months - so I assume no children? In that case I reckon more like 30-40%. If over 7 years it would be 50%...

Yes 18 months, no kids. I don't think I'll mention the "30-40%" figure as she may have a nervous breakdown. Maybe they are just going through a rough patch and things will work themselves out. She says he has changed since they got married but I bet quite a few people say that!

[BrilloPad]

How long marriage? Any children? Starting point is White vs White (2000) which is 50%...

oppps - you did say 18 months - so I assume no children? In that case I reckon more like 30-40%. If over 7 years it would be 50%...

[BrilloPad]

Unfortunately, I think she assumed that because the house was in her name then it still belonged to her.

I don't know how much he would be entitled to in a settlement but since she has no savings or other assets to pay him off, she would probably be forced to sell the family home.

How long marriage? Any children? Starting point is White vs White (2000) which is 50%...

[DonkeyRhubarb]

Are they still together? Do they love each other?

They are still together but the relationship has deteriorated in the 18 months since they got married. She was living at home with her parents and felt lonely and vulnerable after they died. Initially I think she was just glad to have some company and it came as a complete surprise to everyone when they announced that they'd got married. Unfortunately, I think she assumed that because the house was in her name then it still belonged to her.

I don't know how much he would be entitled to in a settlement but since she has no savings or other assets to pay him off, she would probably be forced to sell the family home.

Not a good situation.

[Churchill]

A female friend of ours inherited a country estate (c. £1.5M) from her parents. She befriended a pennyless bloke after her parents died, who moved in with her and helped her look after the place. After a couple of years she agreed to marry him. Even though the house is still in her name, her solicitor has advised her that it would probably have to be sold to pay him off if they ever got divorced.

She now appreciates the significance of the marriage vows for richer, for poorer, for better, for worse...

However, he seems quite happy!

Are they still together? Do they love each other?

[DonkeyRhubarb]

A female friend of ours inherited a country estate (c. £1.5M) from her parents. She befriended a pennyless bloke after her parents died, who moved in with her and helped her look after the place. After a couple of years she agreed to marry him. Even though the house is still in her name, her solicitor has advised her that it would probably have to be sold to pay him off if they ever got divorced.

She now appreciates the significance of the marriage vows for richer, for poorer, for better, for worse...

However, he seems quite happy!

[BrilloPad]

Damn right, me neither! If you put money before love, even when you're in love, then you deserve neither.

tis true. but you also have to ask the motivation of the person you are in love with - if there is a mismatch of money. it has been known for men and women to fake love - and not just for money. take the case of a homosexual man who wants to be married for respectability. it is v v unfair - but it does happen.

[expat]

Love is something you can't plan for.

You just take a leap and hope it works.

I'm divorced, will it stop me from wanting to get married again and trying for kids?

Nope, it won't.

Make the best of it boys and girls, it's only money and contrary to popular belief, you can't take it with you.

Damn right, me neither! If you put money before love, even when you're in love, then you deserve neither.