Agile is Tulip!

[amcdonald]

Agile is just a description of how anyone over the last 40 years handles a project. I've just started my first project using "Agile". Well I'm sorry but apart from the rather silly names like "scrum" is no different to any other project I've worked on.

Agile means
1. You project meetings are called scrum meetings
2. Your project leader is called a "scrum master"
3. Releases are called "Sprints"
4. A requirement is called a "story"
5. You spent thousands getting somone to tell you this

You forgot 6

6. You waste at least an hour a day having a daily standup

[DimPrawn]

Agile is just a description of how anyone over the last 40 years handles a project. I've just started my first project using "Agile". Well I'm sorry but apart from the rather silly names like "scrum" is no different to any other project I've worked on.

Agile means
1. You project meetings are called scrum meetings
2. Your project leader is called a "scrum master"
3. Releases are called "Sprints"
4. A requirement is called a "story"
5. You spent thousands getting somone to tell you this

In my day this was known as Iterative and incremental development - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia and is donkey's years old.

[sasguru]

In my day this was known as Iterative and incremental development - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia and is donkey's years old.

Aye, makes I laff.
Yet some fooking git made a mint by calling it Agile and selling snake-oil to the gullible.
Hmmm gives me an idea for a Plan D:have you heard of the new methodology: Flexible(TM)?
It consists of doing some programming and then, flexibly of course, changing your code to suit changing requirements.

[amcdonald]

Aye, makes I laff.
Yet some fooking git made a mint by calling it Agile and selling snake-oil to the gullible.
Hmmm gives me an idea for a Plan D:have you heard of the new methodology: Flexible(TM)?
It consists of doing some programming and then, flexibly of course, changing your code to suit changing requirements.

Change programmers to ninjas, and scrum masters to zen masters and all the hipster wannabe managers will buy it

[Mich the Tester]

agile methods were generally an improvement because they did away with a lot of dogma and allowed intelligent, experienced developers to interact with users, find out what they wanted and write a system to do it in a way that doesn't obstruct them.

agile in the sense i've seen it applied generally doesn't do any of that. It primarily gives useless people some new ways to occupy their own and other peoples time.

Most methods work a lot better when you don't have useless people cluttering things up.

wds +1,000,000

[original PM]

Lolz...

But seriously - is it better to do full design up front and then develop or do the users simply struggle to give full requirements until they have seen a beta of the system.

My experience tells me the latter but I am not an expert!

[Mich the Tester]

In my day this was known as Iterative and incremental development - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia and is donkey's years old.

[sasguru]

Lolz...

But seriously - is it better to do full design up front and then develop or do the users simply struggle to give full requirements until they have seen a beta of the system.

My experience tells me the latter but I am not an expert!

Using my patented Flexible(TM) methodology, you whip up a beta. Then change it to suit users requirements.
Flexibly, of course (TM).*

*This is the strap line of my new methodology.
I can't be arsed to do it, but I bet I could write a BS book about Flexible(TM) and many cretinous IT "managers" especially in the Public sector, would buy it.

[original PM]

Using my patented Flexible(TM) methodology, you whip up a beta. Then change it to suit users requirements.
Flexibly, of course (TM).*

*This is the strap line of my new methodology.
I can't be arsed to do it, but I bet I could write a BS book about Flexible(TM) and many cretinous IT "managers" especially in the Public sector, would buy it.

Nope!

[doodab]

I think nubile methods could catch on.