Doctors Receptionists

[minestrone]

Were you seeking an appointment about night time incontinence?

[doodab]

Funnily enough, that's exactly what I'm hoping my ailment actually is.

Did you mention this when asking for an urgent appointment? Because dangleberries aren't technically an emergency.

Have you tried eating muesli and staying off the booze for a bit?

[rhubarb]

Were you seeking an appointment about night time incontinence?

Think bowels, not bladder.

Then again, don't think that. Not very pleasant.

[doodab]

Not very pleasant.

It's bloody tulip.

I've been saving that line for the day someone tells me they have bowel cancer.

[rhubarb]

It's bloody tulip.

Bingo

[OwlHoot]

The NHS is broken beyond repair IMHO (except literally at the cutting edge where there are some excellent surgeons).
The rot started in the Labour administration when GPs were given too much money with no corresponding responsibilities. The end result is that many now work part-time since they get paid enough anyway - hence why should they work weekends/evenings or even full time.
And that's why you can't see the same GP every time so they get to know you - like it used to be a few years ago.
And the support staff are quite often rude and arrogant since they have that public sector sense of entitlement added to which is the sense of the NHS as a "sacred cow".

WHS

(Oh God, I just agreed with Sas - Need to go and wash my mouth out with soap now! )

In the UK, governments of all parties are petrified of offending or defying doctors, as these are the modern day equivalent of the high priests and bishops in times past.

[minestrone]

Actually the new contract was all about added responsibility which was targeted through quality points aimed at better patient care, well managed surgeries just got good at hitting the targets which has resulted in better general health over the last decade. Most GPs probably get paid around the 100k mark which is not really that much.

And who needs to work when the wife gets 2 grand a day.

[webclinician]

I guess it is the same anywhere. Overworked and underpaid but this is not an excuse.

[sasguru]

Actually the new contract was all about added responsibility which was targeted through quality points aimed at better patient care, well managed surgeries just got good at hitting the targets which has resulted in better general health over the last decade.

This is an example of NHS-ese , the new language of bullcrap.
Fact is nowadays it is quite rare to form a relationship with one doctor, you're just shuffled from one to another.
That's true of most surgeries in the South - maybe its different up North.

I can't wait till the whole thing just collapses - there are too many mediocre GPs around, who get paid the same as their better counterparts.

[Cliphead]

I have an excellent village surgery, receptionists and doctors are known by first names and although I may not have a season ticket they know my voice on the phone. It's rare not to get an appointment if needed the same day, if I'm willing to wait it'll likely be the next day.

An exception likely being registered at a practice in an affluent village but it works.