What is your BMI?

[AlfredJPruffock]

You are old," said the youth, "as I mentioned before,
And you have grown most uncommonly fat;
Yet you turned a back-somersault in at the door--
Pray what is the reason for that?"

"In my youth," said the sage, as he shook his grey locks,
"I kept all my limbs very supple
By the use of this ointment - one shilling a box--
Allow me to sell you a couple?"

[bogeyman]

Youth: You've eaten all the turnips you greedy old sod!

Fat Bloke: Well, never mind sonny. Bend over the table and I'll give you a good hard filling of my turnip!

Youth: ok. fair enough!

[AlfredJPruffock]

Bah Fiddlesticks !

The text should in fact be

You are old," said the youth, "and your jaws are too weak
For anything tougher than suet;
Yet you finished the goose, with the bones and the beak--
Pray, how did you manage to do it?"

"In my youth," said his father, "I took to the law,
And argued each case with my wife;
And the muscular strength, which it gave to my jaw,
Has lasted the rest of my life."

[AlfredJPruffock]

You are old," said the youth, "one would hardly suppose
That your eye was as steady as ever;
Yet you balanced an eel on the end of your nose--
What made you so awfully clever?"

"I have answered three questions, and that is enough,"
Said his father. "Don't give yourself airs!
Do you think I can listen all day to such stuff?
Be off, or I'll kick you down stairs.

[bogeyman]

"Threaded detects the aroma of a distant pie emporium" W Hogarth 1733.

[Alf W]

Mine's a 325SE