Wet handshakes

[Spacecadet]

I take it back.

Felcher

I see that one of the Apple directors is a Felcher

[EternalOptimist]

handshaking is all about the grip, obviously.
and the best way to practice your grip is to have a tug.

If it takes over five minutes, you are clearly a limp wristed, handshake lettuced poofter

If it takes less than a minute and you have strands of skin and blisters on ones saus, then you are clearly a vice gripped insensitive moronic ass-wipe.


Therefore, the trick of a nice handshake is the ability to have a nice pedestrian (whilst being vigorous), sanguine (whilst being exciting), firm (without squeezing the tub too much) tug


Southerners are at an obvious disadvantage

[doodab]

Southerners are at an obvious disadvantage

We don't get as much practice?

[speling bee]

The limp fish un-nerves the recipient.

[hyperD]

I spray my right hand with Hai Karate and watch with a certain shadenfreude the carnage that's invoked.

[escapeUK]

Worked with a PM once who always heartily handshaked everyone he met. In the two years I worked there, I never once saw him wash his hands in the gents toilets after taking a pee.

Shaking hands should be consigned to history. Clientco is a very sick company, there's always flu, cold, stomach bug, ear infection or some such nasty going around, and the majority cant manage to cover their mouth when they cough so Im pretty sure they arent washing their hands in the toilet. So in the first time in my working life I have one of those little bottle of hand disinfectors on my desk. It hasnt really helped.

[Ignis Fatuus]

I hate wet handshakes. Particularly on men.

But how do you know if you've got one? You can't really try out your own handshake. And danger of limp fish paranoia meaning you exercise vice like grip, which is almost as bad.

So how do you find out if your handshake falls within normal parameters?

If you have a proper handshake, you'll just know.

Don't you know?

[SupremeSpod]

All you little chaps and chapesses worrying about your handshakes.

There are only 3 you need to worry about and they're not referred to as a "handshake".

[VirtualMonkey]

The worst for me are those people who proffer just their fingers...kind of like they think they're the pope and you're about to kiss their hand.

[Mich the Tester]

The worst for me are those people who proffer just their fingers...

whs

Crush them.