“Sometimes the only way you can feel good about yourself is by making someone else look bad. And I'm tired of making other people feel good about themselves.”
sasguru
sasguru
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“The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain” -
beer, the cause of, and solution to, all life's problems.Comment
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“Facts are meaningless. You could use facts to prove anything that's even remotely true.”
sasguru
“The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”Comment
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Bart, with $10,000, we'd be millionaires! We could buy all kinds of useful things like...love!
Well, it's 1 a.m. Better go home and spend some quality time with the kids.
Doughnuts. Is there anything they can't do?
Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.
Lisa, if the Bible has taught us nothing else, and it hasn't, it's that girls should stick to girls sports, such as hot oil wrestling and foxy boxing and such and such.
I want to share something with you: The three little sentences that will get you through life. Number 1: Cover for me. Number 2: Oh, good idea, Boss! Number 3: It was like that when I got here.
If something goes wrong at the plant, blame the guy who can't speak English.
But Marge, what if we chose the wrong religion? Each week we just make God madder and madder.
I think Smithers picked me because of my motivational skills. Everyone says they have to work a lot harder when I'm around.
'To Start Press Any Key'. Where's the ANY key?
PZZComment
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Originally posted by pzz76077 View Post
Practically perfect in every way....there's a time and (more importantly) a place for malarkey.
+5 Xeno Cool PointsComment
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Mr. Burns: [about bringing Marge along on their voyage] What do you think, Smithers?
Smithers: I think women and seamen don't mix, sir.
Mr. Burns: We all know what you think.Comment
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Marge, don't discourage the boy! Weaselling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals!
Except the weasel.Confusion is a natural state of beingComment
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"Television! Teacher, mother, secret lover"
"Beer: The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems"
"I like my beer cold, my TV loud and my homosexuals flaming"
"How is education supposed to make me feel smarter? Besides, every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain. Remember when I took that home winemaking course, and I forgot how to drive?"
"Old people don't need companionship. They need to be isolated and studied so it can be determined what nutrients they have that might be extracted for our personal use"I'll make the money by selling one of my livers. I can get by with one.Comment
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“The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”Comment
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I hadn't heard of the 5 stages of grief until the doc described them on Simpsons:
1. Denial
2. Anger
3. Bargaining
4. Depression
5. Acceptance"take me to your leader"Comment
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