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Am I a bad person....

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    #11
    Originally posted by lightng View Post
    The blind man aside, you crop-dusted on an escalator on the tube where casualties are likely to number in their tens. What kind of a monster are you?
    a
    "Experience hath shewn, that even under the best forms of government those entrusted with power have, in time, and by slow operations, perverted it into tyranny. "


    Thomas Jefferson

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      #12
      Originally posted by lightng View Post
      The blind man aside, you crop-dusted on an escalator on the tube where casualties are likely to number in their tens. What kind of a monster are you?
      A belly one.

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        #13
        Originally posted by Ruprect View Post
        a


        Originally posted by Chugnut View Post
        A belly one.
        Oh yeah. Never saw that. My bad.

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          #14
          Obviously there is more to escalator etiquette than I realised.
          Anyone know a good finishing school?

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            #15
            Originally posted by bellymonster View Post
            I was going up the escalator on the tube this morning and let out a bit of a eggy fart. Behind me, 2 steps lower (and hence his nose was around the height of my arse) was a blind man.

            With his heightened sense of smell, could this have been a dangerous thing to do?

            I truly didn't know he was there until I'd let it go.
            Good question. This depends on how far away the blind man (the receiver) was from you (the transmitter), as the fart would probably have had a tendency to rise (being warmer and less dense than the surrounding air) and to track inside your clothing and follow in your turbulent wake up the escalator, rather than descend or remain at the same height. It's true that the gas would also be radiated in all directions by Brownian motion, but quite slowly and the potency would diminish quickly by the inverse cube of distance. Much of the fart would therefore either have been diverted away from the receiver (less had he had been higher up) and he may well have been spared the worst of the effects, though turbulence is a tricky thing to model. The fact that it was detected by you with a sensor on the opposite end and opposite side of the transmission suggests that the fart did indeed follow you up the escalator and that it was less dense than air, however.

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              #16
              Originally posted by TimberWolf View Post
              Good question. This depends on how far away the blind man (the receiver) was from you (the transmitter), as the fart would probably have had a tendency to rise (being warmer and less dense than the surrounding air) and to track inside your clothing and follow in your turbulent wake up the escalator, rather than descend or remain at the same height. It's true that the gas would also be radiated in all directions by Brownian motion, but quite slowly and the potency would diminish quickly by the inverse cube of distance. Much of the fart would therefore either have been diverted away from the receiver (less had he had been higher up) and he may well have been spared the worst of the effects, though turbulence is a tricky thing to model. The fact that it was detected by you with a sensor on the opposite end and opposite side of the transmission suggests that the fart did indeed follow you up the escalator and that it was less dense than air, however.
              So you're saying I'm not guilty then.

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                #17
                Saw a programme that said that when one farts, minuscule particles of turd are emitted. Just sharing the wealth.

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                  #18
                  Originally posted by Bob Dalek View Post
                  Saw a programme that said that when one farts, minuscule particles of turd are emitted. Just sharing the wealth.
                  Ah, these particles would presumably be denser than air, and therefore detectable by those below. More research into this phenomenon is needed.

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                    #19
                    Originally posted by TimberWolf View Post
                    Brownian motion
                    ... scientific term relating to the spread of poo particles

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                      #20
                      it was less dense than air, however
                      That's a relief (pun intended)

                      Otherwise poor "Lucky" the Guide Dog would have been gassed on the underground.

                      I can visualise the poor chap getting to the end of the escalator and hearing an almighty ripping noise as Lucky gets a Number 1 shave, and feeling his lead go limp.

                      Utterly horrific !
                      Of all tyrannies, a tyranny sincerely exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. It would be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies. The robber baron's cruelty may sometimes sleep, his cupidity may at some point be satiated; but those who torment us for our own good will torment us without end for they do so with the approval of their own conscience.

                      C.S. Lewis

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