DOOM: Don't use the trains at Christmas

[SueEllen]

Perhaps throw in a cough or two.

You could get arrested for that. Better to be simply eccentric and talk about lizards, 5G and Bill Gates.

[jamesbrown]

You could get arrested for that. Better to be simply eccentric and talk about lizards, 5G and Bill Gates.

The police should be able to give definitive advice on whether it's "busy", so you could shout it at them when they arrive.

[clearedforlanding]

You could get arrested for that. Better to be simply eccentric and talk about lizards, 5G and Bill Gates.

Twitching and shouting at an invisible person "you're triggering me" is my go to. A German stare helps as well.

[Mordac]

Just checked, anytime single 2nd Class from my home city to London works out £1.10 per mile.

Hopefully that means you'll be staying at home then...

[ladymuck]

Just checked, anytime single 2nd Class from my home city to London works out £1.10 per mile.

I think that's cheaper than driving my car

[AtW]

I think that's cheaper than driving my car

And a lot cheaper compared to driving ones car into a wall...