Originally posted by Old Greg
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40 Trade Deals
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His heart is in the right place - shame we can't say the same about his brain... -
By methods devious, I have received the following transcript from Our Man in Delhi of a meeting between Dr. Liam Fox and Mr. Suresh Prabhu, the Indian Minister for Trade and Commerce. It is undated and unconfirmed by other sources.
<Tape begins> (Sounds of chairs scraping on the floor).
SP: Come in Dr Fox. Please take a seat. So good to meet you.
LF: Thank you Minister. It is good of you to see me.
SP: Now, what can I do for you today?
LF: I'd like to explore preliminary discussions of a trade deal between our countries to take effect after we leave the EU. Just a few jottings, thoughts, areas of interest and so on and so forth.
SP: Of course! Of course! Delighted to oblige. I've given it some thought, and I've jotted down a few things. Red lines, I believe you term them? I think you're familiar with those?
LF: Err,,. yes.
SP: Good, good. So, firstly we need to get rid of these visas for our citizens and their families. Free entry and no limits. Secondly. the UK will recognise all educational and other qualifications obtained in Indian universities and other establishments. Thirdly, we expect adequate and affordable housing when and where required for our citizens, together with access to all the facilities afforded to your own citizens. Fourthly, we require preferential treatment for our pharma, IT software, and textile and garment industries. I think that'll do to be going on with... is there anything you'd like to say?
LF: Err.... Um.... well, I'll have to think about it and discuss it with my colleagues in Whitehall. I'm sure we can work something out........?
SP: Of course. Delighted to help out the old country in her time of need in any way we can. Just say the word.
LF: Well. thank you Minister (scrape of chair being pushed back). I'll be in touch.
SP: Good, good. I'll look forward to it...... Oh, one other thing before you go...... The big diamond.....
LF: The big diamond?......Err, I don't understand?
SP: Yes, the big diamond in Queen Mary's crown. We want it back. See to it.
LF: (indistinct mumblings) talk it over....the Queen.. Empire.....
SP: Shut the door on your way out Dr. Fox.
<Tape ends>“Brexit is having a wee in the middle of the room at a house party because nobody is talking to you, and then complaining about the smell.”Comment
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