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Recent content by Malacandra
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M
The Plan
In the beginning was the Plan, and the Plan contained Assumptions; And the Assumptions were without form, and void; and the Plan had no substance; and darkness was upon the face of the Employees. And the Employees went unto their Team Leader and said: It is a Crock of $#|7, and it Stinketh. And...- Malacandra
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- Replies: 7
- Forum: Light Relief
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Airmen told 'no uniforms in city'
"Canadian Club on the rocks, please, barman." :spank:- Malacandra
- Post #18
- Forum: General
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RIP Gary Gygax
No good. There's no cure for natural death. Dear me, if I had even a stingy rate for every hour of my time I wasted on that game, I'd be supping a cold one on a sandy beach somewhere even now. 'Bye Gary, those were some fun times.- Malacandra
- Post #11
- Forum: General
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Haven't had this for a while
As "Escalator Repairs" hasn't been announced yet, I believe this is in order: Pimlico- Malacandra
- Post #66
- Forum: Light Relief
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Haven't had this for a while
No, I just get these headaches now and then.:smokin- Malacandra
- Post #59
- Forum: Light Relief
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Haven't had this for a while
Not when there are Sleeping Policemen at Acton Town you don't! That's a three-rail switch, and you didn't Renege first. According to Cryer vs. Brooke-Taylor 1973 you move one place back down the order until the next Clockwise Shunt (note: not a Clockwise Shift - a real beginner's error, but some...- Malacandra
- Post #57
- Forum: Light Relief
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M
New Labour's Financial Nous
Seems you were given rope enough to hang yourself: Nous.- Malacandra
- Post #10
- Forum: General
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Haven't had this for a while
Dollis Hill. Sorry about starting the loop! :laugh- Malacandra
- Post #42
- Forum: Light Relief
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Friday poetry corner
Lilies are white, Violets are funky; If Darwin was right, I'm the son of a monkey. :laugh Yes, I know, but it's funnier this way- Malacandra
- Post #16
- Forum: General
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Anybody want a Russian girlfriend
You know you owe it to yourself and the world in general to string "Olga" along for as long as is humanly possible - ideally getting "her" to comply with a string of increasingly off-the-wall demands. Claiming to have sent money via Western Union and providing fake details to take to "her" local...- Malacandra
- Post #8
- Forum: General
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M
Please put more jokes here
And to give the philosophers some equal time: René Descartes goes into a bar and orders a small pastis, which he sups reflectively while enjoying the ambience. When he is finished, the waiter says "Another pastis, M. Descartes"? "No," says René, "I think not." Whereupon he disappears.- Malacandra
- Post #1,085
- Forum: Light Relief
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M
Please put more jokes here
So Feynman and Heisenberg decided to take a road trip together, with Feynman driving and Heisenberg in charge of the map. Every so often Feynman checks with Heisenberg for directions “Where are we?” “Forty three miles out of Tuscon. Take a left at the next exit.” This sort of thing continues for...- Malacandra
- Post #1,081
- Forum: Light Relief
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Contracting in Netherlands
Funny you should say that. I haven't heard the word "lough" used in thirty-five years, but it's a largish body of water in Ireland, similar to the Scottish "loch". :D- Malacandra
- Post #36
- Forum: General
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M
Oh dear - "Soham Murderer Ian Huntley may be freed"
So in fact "Ian Huntley may be freed" actually means "Some offender might escape conviction, but not Huntley 'cos this doesn't apply to him, but we'll toss in his name for the 'OMGWTF that's outrageous!' factor"? How bizarre that we should have some kind of legal procedure that we have to go...- Malacandra
- Post #25
- Forum: General
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Sequential thread titles
Right now on this forum... Sharia law in UK is 'unavoidable' What's it all about? Inbred Muslims Asked and answered.- Malacandra
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- Replies: 0
- Forum: General
