Update: Wicker Project

[WageSlave]

In keeping with the tradition of CUK personal project updates, I would like to update the board on the construction of the giant wicker tulipsu in the Lone Gunman’s garden. Bit of a mixed bag this past week.
Over the weekend a major milestone was achieved. I managed to place another seven Randolphs in the tulipsu, brining the total to a grand twenty-three Randolphs and four Floellas. Additionally, the nude dancing is going well, with three women in black and white minstrel style, waving their bare bottoms around the tulipsu.

Now for the bad news. On Monday I captured a man I believed to be a Randolph whilst lurking in some bushes outside a dairy and placed him inside the tulipsu. Unfortunately he turned out to be an Estate Agent called Lionel, which caused something of a ruckus inside the wicker tulipsu, causing it to fall over, killing one of the Floellas. I have subsequently removed Lionel and tethered him to the front gate, where he will receive praise from passing Jehovah Witnesses.

[xoggoth]

Best thread of the week WS, I understood every word of it (apart from what a tulipsu is but I LIKE THE SOUND of that, so who cares). Change from boring crap about contracting. I have tried for years to get people on this board out of posting on such miserable topics and have virtually given up now.

Of course it will drop off the bottom of the page like a stone.

www.xoggoth.org

[xoggoth]

Told you so. Back up until somebody else appreciates your genius.

[xoggoth]

Ah!! I knew I could rely on you Z, one of the few odd er (people)? left on the board. All the old guard are abandoning ship these days.

[shaunbhoy]

All good stuff WS, and heartening to see that someone is flying the flag for the monster raving loony party on here these days. I have been unable to contribute as much lately as I have been heavily involved in a project to knit humourous cummerbunds to raise much needed cash for tsunami victims in Tashkent. That coupled with work on a range of "stills" for underprivileged Romanian alcoholic orphans has pretty much had me burning the candle at both ends (fnarr fnarr!).
By the way, you might want to refrain from attracting the attention of the JWs as many of them have recently taken up projectile vomiting as a bit of a diversion from wedging their feet in your doorway.

[steve'O]

I for one would like to thank WS for keeping alive this much forgotten Old English Wicker Craft. There are I believe only 2 surviving people able to do this compared to 180 in the year 1945.
Interestingly Shaunbhoy's Knitted Cummerbunds are so common down here in the south that you can now find them in the Charity shops for approx 45p.

[shaunbhoy]

Interestingly Shaunbhoy's Knitted Cummerbunds are so common down here in the south that you can now find them in the Charity shops for approx 45p.

Precisely. The bottom really has fallen out of that market. Don't be conned mind. The genuine originals also, tellingly, have a small beige-coloured dancing leprachaun motif situated at the lower middle rim of the frontispiece, right next to the gaudy baccy pouch.

[steve'O]

Precisely. The bottom really has fallen out of that market. Don't be conned mind. The genuine originals also, tellingly, have a small beige-coloured dancing leprachaun motif situated at the lower middle rim of the frontispiece, right next to the gaudy baccy pouch.

Now your'e talking. But what colour is the leprachaun in the motif? That is the only way to tell if you have the genuine article, that and the obvious quality that you would never find at the street markets..

[messiah]

is this based on a true story ? sounds like a load of tulipsu to me.