Tissue

[threaded]

The worst thing that can ever happen to you is to grow a wart in middle of the index finger.

When you go to wipe your nose, it just jams.

threaded in "can't remember which comic that was, maybe it was me" mode.

 

[Denny]

Surely that might that have IR35 implications?

I'll just sniff all day on site just to make sure I'm not caught.

 

[Bright Spark]

I'll just sniff all day on site just to make sure I'm not caught.

best to do it in the toilets, and make sure any white powder marks are
not left on your clothes!.

 

[Spoiler]

Or I could either just blow my nose on my sleeve or use screenwipes as tissues.

Someone actually suggested that if you didn't have a tissue handy, sneeze into the crease of your arm (elbow bit!) instead of your hand. This will stop the spread of germs on your hands.

Yeah - I want to walk around all day with crusty snot on my shirt arm. They must have been reading Viz top tips.

Retard.

 

[thunderlizard]

I blew my nose on site a few days ago, not in my own time.

You mean you charge for your nose-blowing time? Assuming nose-blowing isn't one of your company's contracted deliverables, that's got to be an inside-IR35 pointer.

 

[Denny]

You mean you charge for your nose-blowing time? Assuming nose-blowing isn't one of your company's contracted deliverables, that's got to be an inside-IR35 pointer.

It's true that employees also blow their nose, so you could be right there, TL. So I have to find ways of distinguishing myself from the staff. I think I'm OK on the MOO issue: there's no obligation for me to blow my nose and the client can't ask me to blow my nose and only use their hankies on site.

I'll just have to ensure that any hanky I do use isn't the same colour nor incorporates the sames colours as the client's corporate logo. If I decide to use a tissue, instead, I'd better bring my own that has my own company name and VAT registered no in case it gets confused with anyone else's when it's tossed in the bin. Otherwise, HMRC might assume that I pinched it from the box at reception.

In fact, I may get some of my own business hankies made, just to make sure!

 

[BrowneIssue]

In fact, I may get some of my own business hankies made, just to make sure!

When I was a permie, all those years ago, one employer gave us all either a company tie or a company headscarf.

We later got the bad news that these were a 'benefit in kind' and we got taxed on them from our salary.

Might corporate snot rags also be a 'benefit in kind' and so fall foul of PAYE / NI ?

 

[BrowneIssue]

Sorry, off topic

Sorry, off topic

When I was a permie, all those years ago, one employer gave us all either a company tie or a company headscarf.

P.S. The ties were polyester and because they were badly made they had a 'twist' in them so they would hang at an angle, no matter what you did. Wearing them was compulsory. You only got one, so when you got curry down it, you had no other to wear. Remind me again why I went contract?

 

[Denny]

When I was a permie, all those years ago, one employer gave us all either a company tie or a company headscarf.

We later got the bad news that these were a 'benefit in kind' and we got taxed on them from our salary.

Might corporate snot rags also be a 'benefit in kind' and so fall foul of PAYE / NI ?

I think there's an upper limit of 3 tissues a day that you don't have to declare on your PD11 form.

It's disgraceful that HMRC haven't upped the BIK exempt limit during the winter period when flu and colds are more likely.

 

[thunderlizard]

Company tissues

Company tissues

You could emboss them with Monkeyboy's stamp.