Reply to: "Who the F"ck are you"?

[DodgyAgent]

If anyone persists after "I'm not interested and don't phone again" they will get told to **** off.

Because I do it myself I am never rude to people who cold call. I have a garage full of water softeners to prove it.

[minestrone]

If anyone persists after "I'm not interested and don't phone again" they will get told to **** off.

[SimonMac]

"Hello, is that Mrs Mudskipper?"

"Yes"

"My name is Martin and I'm calling to tell you how you can save money"

"I'm not interested"

"You're not interested in saving money?"

"I'm not interested in whatever you're selling"

"How do you know you're not interested if you don't know what I'm selling?"

"Because if its something that interests me I already know about it, so don't need it selling to me."

"Err..."

FTFY

[mudskipper]

"Hello, is that Mrs Mudskipper?"

"Yes"

"My name is Martin and I'm calling to tell you how you can save money"

"I'm not interested"

"You're not interested in saving money?"

"I'm not interested in whatever you're selling"

"How do you know you're not interested if you don't know what I'm selling?"

"Well, let me tell you about the things I am interested in, and you can tell me if you're selling one of them."

"Err..."

[DodgyAgent]

You go to a CxO with solutions not questions.

Talk to the manager/lower bod get an understanding of the issues suggest a solution to the manager and offer to present it as his work to the CxO as a bound solution.

simples!

I have found my replacement.. here are the keys to the bank account..... You will need a paying in book

[DodgyAgent]

DA, have things fallen to such hard times you are thinking of taking advice from Suity?

I will try anything

[Paddy]

I called a senior supervisor at a Tesco Filling Station this morning and he was annoyed that someone should "cold call him" he then sneered at my company when I gave him the name, so I said that we were a small business and did not have a budget for large TV advertising campaigns. I then asked if I should maybe adopt some of his own company methods of selling products. Like what he asked? I said "should I maybe employ some scantily clad totty, stand them outside the head office and offer "promotions".

he failed to see the humour

FTFY

[rd409]

I called a senior manager at a well know Oil company this morning and he was annoyed that someone should "cold call him" he then sneered at my company when I gave him the name, so I said that we were a small business and did not have a budget for large TV advertising campaigns. I then asked if I should maybe adopt some of his own company methods of selling products. Like what he asked? I said "should I maybe employ some scantily clad totty, stand them outside the head office and offer "promotions".

he failed to see the humour

You are not thick enough to be an Agent.

[bobspud]

Senior manager? No wonder you're struggling. What's wrong with the CIO first

You go to a CxO with solutions not questions.

Talk to the manager/lower bod get an understanding of the issues suggest a solution to the manager and offer to present it as his work to the CxO as a bound solution.

simples!

[KentPhilip]

Interesting. I used to do cold calling years ago before I got into IT. I was selling double glazing door to door. I expect Dodgy is familiar with this

Was quite good at it, earning £20/hour commission.

My question is about rates. Gigs I do at the moment average £350/day, through agencies. How much of an uplift could I get on that by cold calling and (hopefully) getting my own clients? Is the time taken in the cold calling paid back in terms of increased rates?

[MarillionFan]

Senior manager? No wonder you're struggling. What's wrong with the CIO first

[Pondlife]

Was this a call to the Royal Dutch one or the What's that leaking all over the Gulf of Mexico one?

[bobspud]

You could have pointed out that clearly he doesn't have the type of staff he needs otherwise the guts of his companies IP would not be laying around on pastebin thanks to the efforts of Anon to save the arctic last year

[SimonMac]

DA, have things fallen to such hard times you are thinking of taking advice from Suity?

[suityou01]

I called a senior manager at a well know Oil company this morning and he was annoyed that someone should "cold call him" he then sneered at my company when I gave him the name, so I said that we were a small business and did not have a budget for large TV advertising campaigns. I then asked if I should maybe adopt some of his own company methods of selling products. Like what he asked? I said "should I maybe employ some scantily clad totty, stand them outside the head office and offer "promotions".

he failed to see the humour

Hats off dodgy!

My cold calling usually goes like this :

Suity : "Hi I'm calling from SuityCo, I was wondering if ....."

Snotty twerp : "We don't take cold calls"

Suity : "Do you ever make cold calls?"

Snotty twerp : "Sorry?"

Suity : "I'm just trying to earn a living here. You have no idea what I'm offering and already dismissing me at the first pass. All I'm saying is that to get work, you must also sell to other businesses and that will involve a certain amount of cold calling also"

This has a 50/50 win rate.

Sometimes, they see the absurdity of their argument and then relax a little. Sometimes it's curtains but worth the try.

Cold calling is horrible at the best of times. Again, hats off Dodgy.