Valentines at the Berni Royal

[gricerboy]

Well Gricer, it sounds like you were thrust from pillar to post on your Valentines night! It's a jolly good job that Malc has calmed down from his recent fraught moods!

Hi DS

Too many innuendos to make about this post .... Far too many

Oh, you should take a look at my back catalogue Wim

[wim121]

Well Gricer, it sounds like you were thrust from pillar to post on your Valentines night! It's a jolly good job that Malc has calmed down from his recent fraught moods!

By coincidence, for my part I was also eating in a velvet-lined booth on Valentines night, and I had a nice bit of fish.

Too many innuendos to make about this post .... Far too many

[Doggy Styles]

Well Gricer, it sounds like you were thrust from pillar to post on your Valentines night! It's a jolly good job that Malc has calmed down from his recent fraught moods!

By coincidence, for my part I was also eating in a velvet-lined booth on Valentines night, and I had a nice bit of fish.

[wim121]

He will probably cancel the cheque you know.

Perhaps. In that situation I would always cash the cheque instantly and take the hit on the couple of pounds handling fee for that.

[BrilloPad]

Did anyone manage to read this to the end? Could you summarise it for me please?

[Freamon]

Who was the food critic?


I would have made him pay £800, kerrrrr-ching-a-dinggg-a-linggg!

Let me know where this critic dines. I'll go to his restaurants and sit at his favourite tables bribing the matre'd, then pocket loads of cash.

Could give up the day job!

He will probably cancel the cheque you know.

[gricerboy]

Utter rubbish, there is no wagamama's near a Whirling Dervish restaurant, a wimpy and a Berni Royal.

Well, you obviously don't know Bath very well Cheffy.

Wagamamas - top of Milsom St.
Wimpy Bar - just along from the Beaunash Cinema
Berni Royal - opposite Bath Spa Station.
The Whirling Dervish - Gay Street

[TheFaQQer]

Wow - gricer, pacha and wim all in the same thread.

Who'd have thought it

[gricerboy]

Who was the food critic?


I would have made him pay £800, kerrrrr-ching-a-dinggg-a-linggg!

Calm down dear!

[wim121]

Who was the food critic?


I would have made him pay £800, kerrrrr-ching-a-dinggg-a-linggg!

Let me know where this critic dines. I'll go to his restaurants and sit at his favourite tables bribing the matre'd, then pocket loads of cash.

Could give up the day job!

[chef]

Utter rubbish, there is no wagamama's near a Whirling Dervish restaurant, a wimpy and a Berni Royal.

[pacharan]

Berni Inns - haven't seen one of those for years.

My first experience of brown French mustard was in a Berni and the love affair has continued ever since.

[wurzel]

You should try The Plume Of Feathers next year....

[gricerboy]

An evening at the Flat Badger gastropub was the venue yesterday for our St Valentine's night soiree but, as I'm about to relate, owing to unforeseen events we both found ourselves on yet another adventure.

It all began just after we'd ordered our Advocaats. We were sat in the bay window of the pub enjoying the view out onto the streets of Bath when in came a certain well known food critic, whose name will go unmentioned, who made it very clear that he wanted to sit at our table.

"How much money do I have to pay you to make you clear off so I can sit at this table?" he snarled.

Before I had a chance to tell him where to stick his money, Malc was talking turkey and a cheque for 500 pounds was quickly proferred.
I felt soiled by our having accepted his money but, nonetheless, we moved to an adjacent table and tried to continue our meal. This was all to no avail as our conversation was drowned out by our critic's references to Michael Caine's roast potatoes and the constant whirling of his napkin around his head to attract attention was also very distracting.

So we got up and left.

Anyway, annoying as it was, the napkin whirling made me mindful of The Whirling Dervish; Britain's first Sudanese restaurant, so named owing to the novel seating arrangements; circular tables groaning with a smorgasbord of gastronomic delights from the Sahel with chairs attached to a revolving carousel. The idea is that your waiter periodically gives the carousel whirl and, when it comes to a stop, the diner is juxtaposed with a fresh set of comestibles.

However, Malc and I quickly spotted the fatal flaw in the business plan of the owner, local restaurateur Ali Bin Shamlan, towit; the acute sensation of nausea experienced after having undergone a couple of whirls. On a table for 2 the G forces are awful. Matters weren't helped by the fact that our allotted waiter for the evening used to man the waltzers at Jennings Fair.

So, with both of us looking a little green around the gills, we upped and left and headed to Wagamamas where we were duly seated on a very spacious table and proceeded to order our drinks.

Ah! peace and quiet at last we thought. Not for long as shortly there was a flurry of activity and places were being laid up next to us on our table. Nobody asked if we minded and when I complained we were told rather abruptly that we were in an authentic Japanese restaurant and that's what people in Japan do. Then a couple of earth mother types sporting dreadlocks and ethnic clothing appeared with two very pusillanimous looking bearded men in tow carrying their babies in thoses papooses that hang from the front. Just the sort of people that Malc can't stand so up we got and left.

We were dissappointed to find the Wimpey Bar closed as we both fancied a bender brunch but salvation was just around the corner and we headed to the place we always go when all else fails.

The Berni Royal.

Here, we were swiftly escorted to our own velvet lined booth where both malc and I could reach our crudities in private without going on a fairground ride and we enjoyed a starter of half a grapefruit topped with a glace cherry, chicken kievs and banana longboats to finish.

It was, to quote Malc, "ruddy luvverly!". Hope you all had a fab Valentines everyone!