Reply to: How to give the agency "1 back"..

[richard-af]

I wonder what Dodgy will make of all this, when he gets back from selling arms, or whatever he's up to.

[wendigo100]

Never mind all the faeces. If you really have niche skills...

Phone the agent, give a false name and disguise your voice (or get someone else to do the talking), and pretend you are calling from a major blue chip.

As Mr Blue Chip, say you need two people urgently with your niche skills, to interview the next working day. Imply it will mean top dollars for the agency, and probably more requirements in the near future.

The agent will then call you about your availability, apologising for "the mix up" before (they do this - they have no shame), and desperately try to get you to an interview.

Leap at the chance, and agree to get back after the interview to say how it went.

Never speak to the agent again.

[Ruprect]

An envelope full of talc is always good for lots of fun. Is it poison? is it Anthrax? Are the police going to get an anonymous tip off that the agents are buying mail order coke/heroin that is going to be delivered that morning....

Plod 1: "Hmm this cocaine smells like imperial leather..."
Plod 2: "Don't worry gov, they're clean"

[Swiss Tony]

Just noticed that the majority of this post was done in July

[Swiss Tony]

If its a bloke, send a seriously large package with stacks and stacks of gay porn. Make it big enough to warrant enough attention around him when opening.

Attach sweet note about what you two get up to in the dark hours. Follow up by sending a love letter every day, differ the envelope etc to make him suspicious of all mail.

At the same time Photoshop some gay porn onto a number of cards with his number on it. Stick in every phone box you can find, esp in certain areas of town where you know they will be appreciated.

If you time this right, a week after huge stack of porn and love letters he will start getting calls. Being an agent he will pick every one of them up …..

[bellymonster]

If you opt for the dog doo in a jiffy bag, make sure you cover it in those polystyrene packing pieces. They are more likley to put their hand deep into the envelope.

[Cooperinliverp00l]

Name and Shame you have justified your reason for naming and shaming so come on lets be having the name.....not enough naming and shaming happening on this forum.

[richard-af]

Just name & shame - that'll work.

[kesm]

An envelope full of talc is always good for lots of fun. Is it poison? is it Anthrax? Are the police going to get an anonymous tip off that the agents are buying mail order coke/heroin that is going to be delivered that morning....

This is hilarious!!! LOL LOL LOL
I am trying to keep a straight face at work... still trying...

[Ardesco]

That I like.

A more expensive way to do it would be to ACTUALLY send some cocaine to the agent and tip off the police...

But that costs lots of money. It would be cheaper to mail order them some propane, nails, petrol and a copy of the Koran and then tip off the police....

[TheFaQQer]

An envelope full of talc is always good for lots of fun. Is it poison? is it Anthrax? Are the police going to get an anonymous tip off that the agents are buying mail order coke/heroin that is going to be delivered that morning....

That I like.

A more expensive way to do it would be to ACTUALLY send some cocaine to the agent and tip off the police...

[sli_gryn]

An envelope full of talc is always good for lots of fun. Is it poison? is it Anthrax? Are the police going to get an anonymous tip off that the agents are buying mail order coke/heroin that is going to be delivered that morning....

true evil! fantastic!

[Ardesco]

An envelope full of talc is always good for lots of fun. Is it poison? is it Anthrax? Are the police going to get an anonymous tip off that the agents are buying mail order coke/heroin that is going to be delivered that morning....

[Kyajae]

Hmmm - don't you need to put your name and address on a special delivery letter though?

False name and address should do it, oh and post it from somewhere you don't live.

[TheFaQQer]

Send a fresh dog turd to the agent by special delivery (on the basis "treat people like sh1t, expect to get some back)

Hmmm - don't you need to put your name and address on a special delivery letter though?

Send them a breeze block in brown paper, with no stamps on it - that way it will cost more to collect.