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Fancy a gig as a pirate? Are you the next Jack Sparrow?

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    Fancy a gig as a pirate? Are you the next Jack Sparrow?

    https://jobsearch.direct.gov.uk/GetJ...?JobID=2547401

    SolarWorld

    Pirate

    Job description

    Pirate

    Job description: To sail the seven seas, fighting mainly but not exclusively the Spanish and French. This varied and exciting roll includes a free sword and parrot, the opportunity to travel, a tax free income and free rum. Working with a highly committed team, the right candidate could become 1st mate very quickly. Additional benefits such as own ship and crew may be possible after probationary period
    You will need: the ability to go “arrgggghhhhh” a lot and continue to function if your right leg is replaced with a wooden stick, along with a positive mental attitude the right candidate must be able to carry out duties such as keel hauling and planking walking, demonstrate a full knowledge of the 1st 5 verses of “what shall we do with the drunken sailor”. We are particularly interested in hearing from people who have replaced their hand with a hook or are missing an eye.
    Remuneration: the role of Pirate meets or exceeds the UK minimum wage.Will be paid monthly in doubloons “Pirates 4 U” is an equal opportunities employer. Time wasters need not apply as we are only interested in talking to serious pirates.
    To apply: place CV in a bottle and throw in ocean towards the north English coast or email to “ I

    <Insert idea here> will never be adopted because the politicians are in the pockets of the banks!

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