A silly thread

[xoggoth]

What is the difference between this thread and tpd?

None.

Let's see... It's grey outside and for breakfast I had...

[xoggoth]

Leaders

Most leaders have psychopathic traits apparently. I think it is high time we ordinary CUKers know who is controlling us, all MODS should take a psychopathy check.

Can't be a*rsed to look up the distinction between psychopathic and psychotic but starts with psycho so probably much the same thing. Look at all those who have been permabanned in the "Who's been banned and why" thread. Can we be sure they are still out there? Or are some of them now dismembered corpses tucked away under NAT's floorboards?

[xoggoth]

Hang on, there's a chap looks who like Eric Cartman creeping down my garden holding a machete.

[xoggoth]

CCTV

We often get stories about absurd E-fits, ones that look like Fred Flintstone or whoever, but many CCTV images released by the police are just as bad, one wonders why they bother. When you compare them with subsequent arrests there is not much resemblance.

Mind you, not seen many as bad as this one. Some heinous criminal stealing bikes from schools!



Maybe Fred Flintstone was actually a culprit. It is clear From that CCTV image that cartoon characters are loose in the community.

[xoggoth]

A solution to zombies

We can never rule it out. One day that zombie plague that we constantly see in horror films may actually happen.

I have an idea that might stop them coming after our brains. During mummification the ancient Egyptians used tools to drag the brains out through the nose. We could use helicopters to drop those tools and videos showing how to use them among the zombie hordes. They love the taste of brains so much they probably couldn't resist using them to pick their noses. Their own rotted brains would probably taste much nicer to them, like a nice mature British cheddar compared to Fromage Frais and other bland French crap.

[xoggoth]

PS

By the way, Land of the Zombies is on the EU accession list. Another good reason to leave. Zombie migrants might be cheap workers but probably not ideal in restaurants or bars.

PS In the above picture, the chap on the right is not a self portrait although I admit there is a certain resemblance.

[xoggoth]

Stop using Google, use Bing!

I'll tell you why. WRT above post, I was trying to think of a food that has to be matured apart from cheese and searched for "matured food". into Bing.

Google shows boring stuff about food as you'd expect and, no, I've haven't got safe search turned on.

Now try it with Bing. 8 out of the 10 links are to porn sites, all about sex with old ladies or people stuffing cake up their thingies.

That would be my ideal search engine, search for anything at all and it takes you to porn sites.

[xoggoth]

Had problems last year getting emails from weird lady friend who's in US at the moment so checked BT webmail spam box in case something there. Cor! Nowt from her but lots of nice explicit stuff.

Maybe there's a setting that lets through all the emails from saucy ladies and puts the boring stuff from relatives, HMRC etc. in the junk instead.

[xoggoth]

Real democracy

Like many I would like a proper democracy and a major aspect of that would be a truly proportional representation. Parties or groups should not be allowed to swing the result by targeting marginal seats.

However, seats should not be allocated to parties according to proportion of votes received but to proportion of total UK citizens whether they voted or not. Not having a clue, not giving a damn or not being bothered to get off your butt represent valid viewpoints. As valid as the crap espoused by the main parties anyway.

So let's have 300 seats and distribute these in proportion to total UK citizenship. If 65% vote that means that 195 seats will be shared between parties while 105 seats will be reserved for non voters. These can be filled with abstaining dummies.

This will cut the costs of these overpaid, expense-claiming bastards by a third and there will be fewer of them to annoy us as well!

[BrilloPad]

Like many I would like a proper democracy and a major aspect of that would be a truly proportional representation. Parties or groups should not be allowed to swing the result by targeting marginal seats.

However, seats should not be allocated to parties according to proportion of votes received but to proportion of total UK citizens whether they voted or not. Not having a clue, not giving a damn or not being bothered to get off your butt represent valid viewpoints. As valid as the crap espoused by the main parties anyway.

So let's have 300 seats and distribute these in proportion to total UK citizenship. If 65% vote that means that 195 seats will be shared between parties while 105 seats will be reserved for non voters. These can be filled with abstaining dummies.

This will cut the costs of these overpaid, expense-claiming bastards by a third and there will be fewer of them to annoy us as well!

And those who do not vote don't get the services of a MP.

Maybe they should not be allowed to vote ever again....