Characters on your train

[EternalOptimist]

Ethnic Eastern European Man. the train is full of them. sit for an hour to see if anyone speaks english ---- they DONT

[moorfield]

And there are those effing morons that bring their bikes on the train!! Jesus

And their riders.

Had to suffer the smelly cyclist sitting opposite me this morning, the one who thinks its a good idea to stink like a soggy dog in public for 45 mins and shower at work.

[moorfield]

Ethnic Eastern European Man. the train is full of them. sit for an hour to see if anyone speaks english ---- they DONT

Tak tak tak tak tak tak tak tak tak tak tak.

Yes I hear that a lot on the end of mobile phone conversations too.

[moorfield]

The regular G*t who puts his briefcase/coat on the inside seat next to him and pretends to be asleep/engrossed in his paper and tries very hard not to meet the eye of passengers getting on looking for a seat in the hope that they will go somewhere else and he won't have any one sitting next to him.

I must admit I do try this on, on occasion, when I'm feeling particularly grumpy.

Although these days I deploy a little plastic curly dog turd that I got from a toy joke box years ago. It works wonders.

So next time you see a little curly dog turd on a spare seat just feel free to tw4t me in the face and shout "Oi Moorfield, move it".

[Platypus]

On every train I have ever travelled on regularly:
The regular G*t who puts his briefcase/coat on the inside seat next to him and pretends to be asleep/engrossed in his paper and tries very hard not to meet the eye of passengers getting on looking for a seat in the hope that they will go somewhere else and he won't have any one sitting next to him.

I make a point of finding such people and asking them (politely) if the seat is taken, thereby causing them maximum inconvenience as they have to get up to let me in

[Doggy Styles]

I occasionally see a well-dressed middle-aged chap who moves very slowly - it takes him nearly to the next station to remove his coat, carefully fold it, place it on the rack, sort out a few more things from his briefcase, and sit down.

Sometimes he'd then take a wad of papers out of his briefcase and slowly tear them up. Most strange.

I thought he might be afflicted by some sort of "mal de tete", but I've heard him on the mobile and he speaks normally enough.

[Mich the Tester]

I occasionally see a well-dressed middle-aged chap who moves very slowly - it takes him nearly to the next station to remove his coat, carefully fold it, place it on the rack, sort out a few more things from his briefcase, and sit down.

Sometimes he'd then take a wad of papers out of his briefcase and slowly tear them up. Most strange.

I thought he might be afflicted by some sort of "mal de tete", but I've heard him on the mobile and he speaks normally enough.

Is this him?

[Doggy Styles]

I wish I'd watched the Reggie Perrin series. I suppose I could get it on DVD.

[Doggy Styles]

We used to have a regular who looked exactly like David Blunkett. Couldn't be him though because he read the paper.

And didn't have a dog with him.

[Jubber]

Mr Wobblehead the Sudoku man.

I noticed this guy one morning when I was rammed in on the Jubilee line. He was playing Sudoku and concentrating very hard. Every time he completed a line he would give himself a congratulatory head wobble. It amused me at the time.

Then, another morning I was again stuffed in with the great unwashed and out the corner of my eye I detected a head wobble. It was him. Hard at it again.