EU to ban cake burning denial

[xoggoth]

Some have long wanted the ridiculous crime of Holocaust denial to apply to the whole of the EU rather than just Germany where their unique history and the existence of Neo-Nazis seeking to rehabilitate Hitler presented at least a shred of justification. So far reason or inertia has won out, after all, the rest of have never actually got round to gassing anyone yet.

Now it seems the Europhiles had a plan B. From next April, it will be a crime to deny various defining events in each of the EU states; here in the UK it will be an offence to deny that King Alfred burnt the cakes.

"It is most important to emphasise that we are not aiming to create a European state as the parochial xenophobic Europhobes say" a spokeman told our reporter "and we intend to show this by reinforcing certain iconic national events with this new law. People in the UK should rightly be proud that your king burnt those cakes."

"Then while everyone is arguing about this sort of nonsense, we can get on with quietly removing all those aspects of nationality that really matter" he added off camera.

Update
Scots nationalists demand replacement of Burnt Cake Denial law with Watching Spiders Try Again Denial law