Natural Born Killers

[EternalOptimist]

The smallest of our four cats is a little black and white Al-Queada infiltrator. She was an abandoned little ball of fleas when we took her in, and the other three gave her lots of leeway. She now torments the life out of them, chasing them, ambushing them and generally being mischevious. She jumps up on the missus and sucks her top, leaving a little wet catty-mouth-marks,
she never had a proper mum.
Anyways, last week, we found tufts of white fur all over the garden and then the missus heard a terrible catawauling. A big black cat had the little one pinned down and was ripping lumps out of it.
On sunday the missus found the big black mog in the kitchen stealing their cat food, but she wouldnt let me chuck it out.
Well last night, she was out at work, I espied the b@stard in the garden, and was tempted to leave the door open to entice it in.
I was thinking 'dont mess with the monkeys moggie, we are natural born killers'

So what should I do ? visit it with monkey retribution, or leave the natural world to look after itself ?

[Churchill]

Originally Posted by EternalOptimist

The smallest of our four cats is a little black and white Al-Queada infiltrator. She was an abandoned little ball of fleas when we took her in, and the other three gave her lots of leeway. She now torments the life out of them, chasing them, ambushing them and generally being mischevious. She jumps up on the missus and sucks her top, leaving a little wet catty-mouth-marks,
she never had a proper mum.
Anyways, last week, we found tufts of white fur all over the garden and then the missus heard a terrible catawauling. A big black cat had the little one pinned down and was ripping lumps out of it.
On sunday the missus found the big black mog in the kitchen stealing their cat food, but she wouldnt let me chuck it out.
Well last night, she was out at work, I espied the b@stard in the garden, and was tempted to leave the door open to entice it in.
I was thinking 'dont mess with the monkeys moggie, we are natural born killers'

So what should I do ? visit it with monkey retribution, or leave the natural world to look after itself ?

A couple of strategically placed claymores should do the trick...

[Zippy]

Keep a water pistol handy and if it gets in the kitchen again shoot to kill.

[EternalOptimist]

Originally Posted by Zippy

Keep a water pistol handy and if it gets in the kitchen again shoot to kill.

You are too soft for this type of man-to-cat warfare zippy. If you attack my black and white ally, it's the rolling pin and bloody vengeance

or a slap with the wooden spoon at least

[DaveB]

Originally Posted by EternalOptimist

You are too soft for this type of man-to-cat warfare zippy. If you attack my black and white ally, it's the rolling pin and bloody vengeance

or a slap with the wooden spoon at least

Depends on the water pistol. Get one of those Super Soaker jobs and it'll never show it's face again.

[EternalOptimist]

Originally Posted by DaveB

Depends on the water pistol. Get one of those Super Soaker jobs and it'll never show it's face again.

ok.I need a black bally clava and a silencer for the supper soaker

[Moscow Mule]

Originally Posted by DaveB

Depends on the water pistol. Get one of those Super Soaker jobs and it'll never show it's face again.

Next door have an anti-cat, movement activated, sprinkler system. Seems to work quite well, except the chap keeps forgetting to turn it off when he goes to the shed...

[RichardCranium]

Tempt it in, bung it in a box, get it up the vet's and have its knackers cut off.

Or, tempt it in, bung it in a box, drive over the box, bung the box in the bin.

[Peoplesoft bloke]

all cats are tulip and must be killed. Now.

[realityhack]

EO - build yourself one of these, and entice it with Sheba or some such posh cat food.