Crazy things that put you off buying a house

[psychocandy]

My Mrs once refused to entertain buying an otherwise OK house because there was a huge turd in one of the toilets.

I did try to explain it was neither alive nor a permanent feature and could be flushed away (even if you had to phone the water company to get the big knives out) or otherwise destroyed. But she wouldnt have it.

Was a big one mind. Top end sticking out of the water - bit like an iceberg it was. Proper zeppelin - I would have been proud of it.

[WTFH]

No patio to bury the bodies under. That's a dealbreaker.

Amateur.

You don't want a patio, you need there to be ground you can build a patio on afterwards.
Better yet, make sure there is some woodland near the house.

[MrMarkyMark]

FTFY

Amateur.
If you must tulip on your own doorstep make sure there is a pig farm near the house.

[d000hg]

What about all the cats owned by people who aren't crazy?

[OwlHoot]

it's a red line for me if the pub is frequented by ranger rover driving to the manor borne's who flash their tax avoiding cash in the faces of the regular drinkers.

What do you have against us? At least I occasionally buy a round

[OwlHoot]

I'd never live in a semi again.

There's always the possibility of hearing the neighbours through the walls & I can't stand that.

I've also looked at some semi detached cottages with some very quirky boundary arrangements.

Link-detached isn't so bad, i.e. no common walls, but maybe a "semi-detached garage" between them.

Alternatively, a row of adjoining properties up a steep hill can be terraced technically but for all practical purposes detached.

[The_Equalizer]

I'd never live in a semi again...

'Apartment' (which is a Estate Agent speak for flat) for the above reason times 2/3/4.

[fullyautomatix]

I'd never live in a semi again.

There's always the possibility of hearing the neighbours through the walls & I can't stand that.

I've also looked at some semi detached cottages with some very quirky boundary arrangements.

In one, the neighbour's office actually extended into the downstairs hallway so you had this kind of box like protuberance halfway along the party wall.

Another one I've seen a few times is where the neighbouring property has an elevation facing (often with a window) directly onto your garden. Then, of course, they'll also have right of access into your garden so they can clean their guttering.

Don't like any of that at all.

Hi FLC

I live in a Semi and do not notice any noise from neighbours, I guess it depends on the type of construction etc. I lived in a terrace a while ago and god, never again. The walls were paper thin and could hear the next door engaging in loud sex all through the night.

[Pip in a Poke]

'Apartment' (which is a Estate Agent speak for flat) for the above reason times 2/3/4.

Yes, indeed. Unless it's the sole penthouse apartment.

Even then you can have noisy sods below.

[The_Equalizer]

Hi FLC

I live in a Semi and do not notice any noise from neighbours, I guess it depends on the type of construction etc. I lived in a terrace a while ago and god, never again. The walls were paper thin and could hear the next door engaging in loud sex all through the night.

Current house is borderline non-standard construction. The floors upstairs are made of solid concrete. The house may be ugly as sin, but one of the few benefits is its excellent sound insulation.